What’s for supper? Vol. 465: Life with Abby Normal

Hello! Hello! Hello hello hello. I am so very sorry it’s been so long. I will tell you what we’ve been up to, and why I’ve been off the radar. 

The truth is, most of what has been preoccupying me are stories that are not mine to tell. So I will just ask you, in your kindness, to please pray for the beloved X family, and the beloved Y person, the Z beloved person, and the beloved kid. Multiple rolling emergencies and really painful situations.

Then right before Holy Week, we were finally able to procure a family member’s diagnosis we’ve been fighting for for two years; and then right after that,

I found out I have a freaking brain tumor.

It’s BENIGN, and growing very slowly. I may have had it for ten or even twenty years, but it has only been symptomatic since about October. I got an MRI on March 24th and saw the neurosurgeon on April 7th. It is almost certainly a trigeminal schwannoma, which is rare but almost always benign. But look at this thing!

What the heck!?!

I can try medication to control the symptoms, radiation to keep it from getting bigger, and/or surgery to remove as much as possible, depending on how tangled up in nerves it is. The catch is that radiation sometimes causes scar tissue, so if I do need subsequent surgery, it will complicate matters. 

It’s very unlikely to cause an aneurism, though, so I’ve got that going for me. To my disappointment, it is not what’s causing my migraines, which are global; whereas all my schwannoma symptoms are all markedly on the left, (so I cannot ask them to implant the spare Instant Pot valve I have, which would allow them let the steam out when I need to. And they call themselves specialists, pah.) The way it’s placed, it affects my facial nerves (so, tingling, numbness, headaches, and potentially double vision) but not really scary stuff like speech, memory, or cognition.

Although, as it turns out, knowing you have a brain tumor, but not being able to meet with the neurosurgeon to discuss the implications for a full two weeks does affect your speech, memory, and cognition, especially when you are preparing for Easter, Passover, and a birthday all in the same week.

And that’s the main reason I’ve been struggling to get writing done: Knowing something is wrong, not knowing how serious this is, and not being able to tell anyone, including the kids, because I don’t really know anything! So it’s a huge relief to actually have some information. 

To put it into perspective, the neurosurgeon made an appointment for six months to check in with me, in case I haven’t made a decision by then. So yes, I have to deal with it, but it’s not a, yanno, BRRRRAINNNN TUMORRRRR!!!! It’s just a . . . brain tumor. Which is still not IDEAL, but you know, I got the initial MRI in the evening twelve days before Easter, feeling like it was silly to make such a big deal out of some little stuff, and probably I was just imagining it anyway, and probably if I learned how to hold my neck right, my symptoms would go away.

Then the next morning I opened up the portal expecting them to say everything is fine and I must have just tweaked a nerve by chewing gum too forcefully or something.

Instead it said “tumor” and “neurosurgeon,” and I closed my eyes and some tears leaked out, and then I was like, “Okay, Jesus. I did not ASK for a tumor. So clearly this must be YOUR tumor. So I am officially handing it over to you.” And it has been a pretty light burden since then. (With some more crying, but I always cry at Easter anyway.) 

So now I just have to figure out what to do. Right now, for various reasons, I’m leaning toward surgery, preferably at the end of the summer. I would be in the hospital for 2-3 days, and recovery would be 4-5 weeks. Prolly gonna keep most of my hair and get an interesting scar behind my ear, and my skin will not enjoy the radiation I guess. The surgeon did say I might struggle with chewing and talking for a bit, and I did say BUT THOSE ARE MY TWO FAVORITE THINGS TO DO. 

Any. Freaking. Way. Life goes on, and Damien has been an absolute rock. He has been really sick with a horrible sinus infection for most of Lent, but in callous disregard for his illness, the cars have both been breaking repeatedly, sometimes simultaneously, and also Sophia’s car, too; and also the water heater, the bathroom sink, a drain pipe in the basement, and half a dozen other things I’m forgetting about, have been breaking. Yesterday we drove home from the dentist, got out, and the door fell off. 

Which I have never seen before! But he has just been going ahead and watching tutorials and ordering parts and fixing everything, one by one by one by one, and even saying things like, “It’s okay if  you want to get rid of this loveseat you just asked me to pick up from Facebook Marketplace, and find another one, and I will pick that one up, too.”

We didn’t get a nuclear war, so that was good. The first round of eggs we put in the incubator didn’t hatch, so we just started a second batch. None of the peach pits I planted have sprouted, but my rhubarb is suddenly thriving, the crocuses are coming in thick and gorgeous this year, and even though the snow plows threw tons of gravel up over my garden, the daffodils are just ignoring it and poking through anyway. Jesus is risen, the sun comes up every stinking day, and life is good. Gonna build Corrie’s tree house this spring if it kills me. 

NOW, who wants to see the strawberry Tom Servo cake with cream cheese frosting I made for Irene’s birthday?

Poor guy is leaning pretty badly, but I was proud of him anyway. I was also pretty pleased with the earrings I made her, and it turns out carving wood and twisting up little bits of metal are a really good way to occupy your mind, so you don’t go crackerdog.

I guess I will just do a quick round-up of foods, starting with Passover. All my Passover recipes are here. 

We had cinnamon garlic roast chicken: 

chopped liver, gefilte fish, and spinach pie bites:

roast lamb:

Chicken again, and charoset:

Of course we had chicken soup with matzoh balls, but I forgot to take pictures. This year, I decided to try using seltzer in the matzoh balls, which is supposed to make them light and fluffy. It worked a little too well, and about half of them fell apart! I’ll probably go back to the can recipe next year, and just take my chances. 

Yes, I was worried there wasn’t enough dessert: 

I did the same thing I did last year with the sponge cake, and squeezed fresh lemon and orange juice, then forgot to add them. So I made a syrup with half the juice, poked a bunch of holes and let it soak in; and then I made a glaze with the rest and poured it over the top. Pretty nice. 

Several of the big kids were able to come over, the other kids brought a guest, and we had a lovely seder, even though we never did find the beautiful illustrated haggadahs. Here is Corrie reading the four questions: 

Then we went to the Easter Vigil, which was three hours long and very beautiful and threeeeee hours long. Got home, set out the kids’ baskets, and went to sleep. I spent most of Easter Sunday in bed and I didn’t even feel bad about it. 

We kind of muddled through the rest of the week with leftovers, Aldi pizza, and bagel sandwiches. Then Wednesday I chopped up and heated up the leftover lamb and leftover chicken from Passover,

and I made some pita and we had extremely delicious gyros. Some of the pita turned out a little . . .unpuffy . . but it was still an excellent meal, which we ate with the pita still hot from the pan. I had mine with lamb, red onion, yogurt sauce, feta, tomatoes, and hot sauce. 

Scrumptious.

Then yesterday morning, I quick pickled some carrots and got some pork marinating with onion, garlic, sugar, pepper, and fish sauce, and roasted that up right before supper 

and we had banh mi on toasted baguettes, and some of us added chopped liver. Banh mi is already the queen of all sandwiches, and the chopped liver puts it right over the top. 

Insanely delicious. 

Not sure what we are having today, but it is MEATSTER, so I may spring for some hamburgers or something. 

And that’s-a my story!