candy – SIMCHA FISHER

What’s for supper? Vol. 448: November, no cry

Happy Friday! I’m in a bad mood, but I still made some good food!

SATURDAY
Leftovers + taquitos

Just a regular shopping day. Shopping just gets more and more stressful because everything is so expensive, plus I think it was Saturday that a lot of people got their EBT cards refilled after a long delay, so the store was insanely mobbed. I think people were justifiably afraid their accounts were going to get emptied again without warning, so everyone was stocking up, and the mood was just . . . distinctly un-merry. Un-merry indeed. But we got it done and came home intact, and ate taquitos.

SUNDAY
Tacos al pastor, black beans, pomegranates

On Sunday, when we got home from Mass, I started some meat marinating for tacos al pastor, and then I made a quadruple batch of these apple cider sea salt caramels I keep thinking about, from Smitten Kitchen.

You just boil the cider down until it reduces to a syrup, then add white sugar, brown sugar, heavy cream, and butter, and then boil it again. I used an entire gallon of cider, so it took longer, but it wasn’t difficult at all.

Then you stir in sea salt and cinnamon, and pour it into a lined pan. She says in the recipe that you need to get all your stuff ready to go when it reaches the right temperature, and she is not kidding! But it’s pretty straightforward, as long as you can read a candy thermometer.

You can see that the pan was too big, so I made a little dam out of tinfoil, and that worked fine.

Then you let it cool and harden, and then you can cut it up.

Scrumptious. Caramel and apple are two of my favorite flavors, and these taste deeply of both, and they are very chewy and creamy. They do lose their shape at room temperature. I portioned them out into mini cupcake papers put them in the fridge, and that worked well. I might cut them into bits and make ice cream at some point, and I might make another batch to give out as little Christmas presents.

Then, as I had repeatedly warned the kids we were going to do, we did a big giant horrible outdoor clean-up, front and back, and let me tell you, it is a long time since I have been glared at that much. I was glaring at myself! It was not fun! It was cold and muddy out there, and there was a lot of roof debris, and there was one spot in the yard where some kid was spray painting a Halloween costume, so there was a silver circle on the grass, and one of the ducks pooped right in the middle. I was the only one who thought it was funny. But we got it done, and now we are — not ready for snow, but not in a situation where the first snowfall will make me feel like a failure as an adult or a homeowner or a yard-haver or whatever. (We have had a few bits of snow, but not a heavy blanket of snow yet.)

Clara and her boyfriend invited us out to dinner, but we were too exhausted to go out, so instead we invited them over. I Was Afraid There Wouldn’t Be Enough Food (and if I ever write a cookbook, that will be the title, maybe with a little smiley face to show that it’s okay, this is not a book about famines.. Or maybe I won’t call it that), so I made a pot of black beans and cut up some pomegranates, and there was plenty.

I followed this recipe pretty much exactly

Jump to Recipe

except I didn’t cook the second pineapple, but just served it raw in chunks. I don’t have a strong preference for either way. It was good! The meat came out nice and tender, with that good spicy, smokey taste

and it was a tasty, pleasant meal after a long day outside.

Oh, the beans were pretty good, too, although maybe I used too much cumin. Here’s my recipe for that

Jump to Recipe

and I also chopped up a bunch of fresh spinach and threw that in there, even though the people in our family who most need Secret Spinach don’t eat beans anyway.

I ate more cider caramels than I choose to remember clearly, but there were still lots and lots left over, so, feeling competent and motivated, I packaged up a bunch to be mailed to various people. Take that!

MONDAY
Chicken quesadillas, chips, beans

On Monday, Clara’s boyfriend came over and fitted up the new roof area with eaves and soffits and whatnot. It looks fantastic. We have to redo the drip edge and put some siding back and paint the eaves, but it’s basically done. What a long, drawn-out ordeal, but it feels great when it’s rainy and windy outside and we can just sit in the living room and fully expect not to get dripped on.

Monday evening I cut up a rotisserie chicken and made quesadillas (plus jalapeños for me and Damien) and served that with chips, salsa, sour cream, and the rest of the beans.

Quesadillas is another thing I never ate or even saw until I was in college. It’s a shame they weren’t on my family’s radar, because my mother would have really loved them. It’s funny to think that, just a few decades ago, there just . . . wasn’t non-American food where I lived. There was a Chinese restaurant where you could get pupu platters and wonton soup and chicken fingers, and maybe if you were willing to drive, you could get Italian. My father had an authentic Chinese cookbook for when he was feeling ambitious, and my parents retained a few middle eastern dishes from when they lived in Israel, but other than that, the most exotic thing I ever encountered growing up was a banana. Maybe some parsley. It’s just funny how quickly things changed!

TUESDAY
Maple roasted chicken with potatoes, carrots, and Brussels sprouts

The kids were home for Veteran’s Day, and I left them alone (they made popcorn and watched the Lego Ninjago movie; very satisfactory) and I got the meat marinating for this new-to-me recipe, maple roasted chicken from Sip and Feast.

Then I started putting together the trellis/pergola/arbor thingy I bought a while ago. If you’ve been following the sad, sad story of our front entrance, we tore down the porch last summer, planned a sunroom, then downgraded plans to a small porch, then to a portico, then to an awning, and then I bought this trellis thingy because we’re about to start getting a million packages for Christmas, and I don’t want them to sit on the front step and get wet. Also I’m tired of the house looking like its front was chopped off, which it was. Also I want to have something to put Christmas lights on! Reasonable desires, and a cheap trellis thingy seemed like a reasonable solution. I was even thinking of rambler roses and whatnot, and getting kind of inspired at what a beautiful, cottagey look I could achieve.

So I started putting this thing together and immediately realized they hadn’t cut out half of the slots to make it fit together. That’s okay! I’m competent and motivated, so I used a hacksaw and a chisel and cut new slots, and even painted them so it wouldn’t be raw wood exposed to the elements.

Got the thing put together pretty quickly, and even realized before it was too late that I should move it out of the kitchen before I put it completely together, or else it would not fit out of the kitchen! I was really feeling on top of the situation, and figured I would just drag it outside, and then in the morning I could just zip zip zip set it up and we would have a beautiful house. It felt so good to finally be making progress on this interminable project.

Supper was really good! It’s pretty simple. You just marinate the chicken (I had drumsticks and thighs), then roast the vegetables and potatoes for a while, then put chicken and marinade on top of that and roast it some more. It has you cutting the tops off some entire heads of garlic, and roasting that along with the rest, which is always pretty

The recipe calls for parsnips, but I skipped that and just did fingerling potatoes, baby-cut carrots, and Brussels sprouts. I made a SINGLE RECIPE, and it was plenty of food, which kind of blows my mind, but it happens more and more often these days. Teeny tiny little family of seven.

Anyway, the dish turned out great, and it’s a wonderful fall or winter dish, with the maple flavor.

Very photogenic, too.

Another win for Sip and Feast!

WEDNESDAY
Marcella Hazan sauce with sausage on pasta

Wednesday I started this super-simple sauce going. I don’t think I’ve harassed you lately to try this sauce, but you really should. Can you open a can of tomatoes and put it in a pot with some butter and an onion? Then you can make something wonderful!

Okay, this picture is a little misleading because loose Italian sausage was on sale, so I cooked that up and added it to the sauce. But even without sausage, it’s incredibly rich and savory. The recipe

Jump to Recipe

has you take the onions out before serving, but I generally leave them in, and people (including me) just eat them. I only had red onions, and it still turned out great.

I think only one kid made Cup O’ Noodle, so that’s a win.

I did go on a bit of a cleaning rampage during the day, and attacked the bathroom walls and ceiling and grout with a mop, a swiffer, a Magic Eraser, a scrubbing brush, baby wipes, CLR, and Concrobium. They look better, but not as good as you would have expected if you had witnessed the fury with which I scrubbed. I also dripped a little cleanser into my eye when I was doing the ceiling, but it’s the eye that already has a giant brown floater in it, so I thought perhaps it would cancel that out. Which will tell you something about my state of mind.

With my leftover fury and mental clarity, I went outside and attached a little roof to the trellis thingy. We have a lot of sheets of corrugated polycarbonate — really, more than most people — so I found a piece that was the right size and screwed it on, easy peasy.

This is one of several pictures I took before I attached anything, intending to ask Facebook which roof material looked best, but then I got mad about . . . something, I forget what, and decided I could figure it out for myself.

Then I spent KIND OF A LONG TIME attempting to set the friggin thing up. I couldn’t get it high enough, level enough, centered enough, or close enough to the house, and also I hadn’t really accounted for the outdoor light, and I dropped it multiple times and broke three different parts of it, was incredibly unkind to the dog, and then ran out of daylight. But, I did not impale myself on anything, or hit myself in the face with a hammer, and nobody called the police on me, so we’ll call that a win. I still had high hopes that I, being competent and motivated, could get it done the next day.

THURSDAY
Chicken burgers, puffed corn, broccoli

Thursday, I was absolutely determined to get that trellis up. Just get it up. It’s not a hard project! It should be an easy project! I just needed to push through! I am competent! and motivated!

I decided that, rather than building it up from the ground up and then securing it to the house, I would affix it to the house first, and then shore up the bottom. This involved two ladders, two drills, two kinds of screws, and some carriage bolts I had bought for the tree house I never built but I definitely will, plus some of the most appalling work with a circular saw I’ve ever seen, and I’m afraid the dog was again spoken to in ways he didn’t fully deserve, except in a kind of cosmic sense.

Eventually I conceded that I couldn’t do it myself, so Damien helped me get the trellis thing up there, and GUESS WHAT? It looked ridiculous. It was centered and level, but much too high, and looked absurd. And also, the whole rest of the house is terrible. And everything is terrible.

So now there are three different pieces of wood stuck to the house at various heights, and the trellis is still lying on the ground, and it is cracked in three spots. But I wasn’t even ready to throw in the towel until I realized I was standing on tip toe on a stack of cinder blocks in the rain, using a hammer to hit a screw as hard as I could, and then the very last rational cell in my brain gathered its courage and told me to go inside and give up for the day. So I did.

I just wanted something to put a string of Christmas lights on, and now it seems like even if I manage to get the thing attached, the rest of the house is just so much grosser and dirtier and shabbier than I realized. In retrospect, it seems unlikely that people have been driving past the house and laughing at me, but yesterday that felt very true. I don’t know. It’s just friggin November and everything is the worst. I fully recognize that I am feeling more discouraged about not getting a trellis up than the situation really warrants, but I’m sure you can see this is one of those freighted problems. It’s not really just about the trellis! But at the same time, getting that freaking thing up would help, a lot.

Anyway we wrapped up the day with a fairly squalid supper. I took this photo just so I would remember what we ate, but it’s pretty illustrative of the day in general.

Splort. I did take down the sunflower head that’s been drying for several weeks and got all the seeds off it, and bag them for the spring, so that’s something.

I attempted to make a little ASMR-style video about it, but actually I took a video of myself dropping the camera. AND THAT WAS FRIGGIN THURSDAY.

You know what, I did drop off three bags of dresses at the thrift store, and I did mail three packages, and I did do some pretty okayish writing. Also, Damien and I are gonna see Frankenstein this weekend. And my car ran out of oil somehow (a leak, obviously), but I stopped and got new oil right away before anything exploded, and I didn’t even get oil all over my pants, so we’ll call that a win, too. And I cleaned my room.

And, for probably the biggest win of all, I didn’t eat any caramels all week, even though there are about 400 pieces left. I’m gonna eat some tomorrow, though! Watch out, caramel!

FRIDAY
Tuna noodle?

I asked the kids what they wanted, and that is what they said. Excelsior! November has to end eventually, and when it does, I’ll be there. Possibly tottering on a pile of cinderblocks with a hammer in my hand, but I’ll be there.

Tacos al pastor

Ingredients

8-10 lbs pork butt or loin

For the marinade:

2 pineapples, cut into spears (one is for the marinade, and set the other aside for cooking separately)
3 onions quartered
1.5 cups orange or pineapple juice
3/4 cup white vinegar
1/3 cup ancho chili powder
1 entire head garlic
3 chipotles in adobo
1-1/2 tsp salt
1 Tbsp oregano

For serving:

flour tortillas
sliced red onion
chopped cilantro
lime wedges

Instructions

Thinly slice the pork.
In a food processor or blender, combine one of the pineapples and the rest of the marinade ingredients. Blend until smooth. (You will probably have to do it in batches.)
Marinate the sliced meat in the marinade for at least four hours.
Pan fry, grill, or broil the meat and the spears of the second pineapple. Roughly chop cooked meat and pineapple.
Serve pork and pineapple on tortillas with sliced red onion, chopped cilantro, and lime wedges.

Instant Pot black beans

Ingredients

2 tsp olive oil
1 onion, diced
6-8 cloves garlic, minced
2 16-oz cans black beans with liquid
1/2 cup fresh cilantro, chopped
1 Tbsp cumin
1-1/2 tsp salt
pepper to taste

Instructions

Put olive oil pot of Instant Pot. Press "saute" button. Add diced onion and minced garlic. Saute, stirring, for a few minutes until onion is soft. Press "cancel."
Add beans with liquid. Add cumin, salt, and cilantro. Stir to combine. Close the lid, close the vent, and press "slow cook."

Marcella Hazan's tomato sauce

We made a quadruple recipe of this for twelve people.

Keyword Marcella Hazan, pasta, spaghetti, tomatoes

Ingredients

28 oz can crushed tomatoes or whole tomatoes, broken up
1 onion peeled and cut in half
salt to taste
5 Tbsp butter

Instructions

Put all ingredients in a heavy pot.
Simmer at least 90 minutes.
Take out the onions.
I'm freaking serious, that's it!

What’s for supper? Vol. 369: In which I trust the process

Friday again! What do you know about that. I had no way of knowing this was coming, but here we are.

Here’s what we had this week:

SATURDAY
Chicken burgers, chips

I guess I went shopping, and I guess we had chicken burgers when I got home. Plausible, but I have no memory of it.

SUNDAY
Cumin chicken with chickpeas, elite pita

I sort of remember Sunday. Some of the older kids were over, and chicken thighs were on sale, so I made this simple but tasty sheet pan meal: Lemony, cuminous chicken thighs marinated in yogurt with onions and chickpeas.

Jump to Recipe

I got the chicken marinating in the yogurt sauce in the morning, and I made the red onion, parsley, and lemon juice side dish, but discovered to my sorrow that I hadn’t bought enough yogurt to also make yogurt sauce.

I did, however, make homemade pita. I followed the recipe from TheKitchn, which has directions for both oven-baked and pan-cooked pita. I started a double recipe of dough and set it to rise, and then I finally got around to tapping some maple trees.

We have 1.25 acres of land, and I went around with my Picture This app, identifying leafless trees, and we have more trees than I can count . . . except maple. We turned out to have a grand total of two maple trees, and one of them is just a little guy.

I tapped it anyway, as you can see, but it hasn’t produced much. (Normally I’d be excited to see the stream running and not frozen, but it barely froze this year!)

The other tree is a pretty good producer, although the nights have been warming up, so it’s stop-and-start.

I had been storing the sap outside in bags inside a bin, but I misjudged the temperature, and I’m afraid the sap I already collected may have spoiled. I made a new dumb mistake every year I do this, very exciting! Anyway there’s still some late winter left, so I haven’t given up. Too dumb to give up.

I also scoped out the wattle materials situation, and I gathered up a variety of straight, supple branches that I will probably practice on before I invest in a large amount of stakes. Trying out all different kinds of wood and vines.

And I planted the last of my winter sowing jugs. I didn’t end up with as many as I wanted, but there’s a lot of variety, vegetables and flowers.

The group I’m in keeps saying “trust the method,” which is what groups always say when things are clearly going horribly wrong, but I also have not given up on this. It was WONDERFUL WONDERFUL WONDERFUL to be outside in the fresh air. And I have a variety of flowers and vegetables sprouting indoors, as well.

So then, feeling frisk and fine, I went inside and slid the chicken and chickpeas in the oven and started on the pita.

Now, I own a wooden rolling pin and a marble rolling pin and even a pink plastic toy rolling pin that can be useful in a pinch, but they had all vanished into . . . I don’t know where. I imagine there is some shadowy, cthonic kitchen cabinet somewhere with all my useful kitchen stuff in it, waiting fearfully in the dark for what comes next. There abide the whisk with the nice handle, floating around eerily, wreathed in mist and flour; biscuit dough cutters flickering in and out of visibility and wailing, unheard, longing to be touched by human hands once more. That one butter knife with the pretty pattern on the handle, just clattering fruitlessly around in the gloom.

However, I did find the embossed rolling pin we got one of the kids for Christmas one time, and that is how I made my very first . . . .

ELITE PITA

Isn’t that lovely?

I wasn’t sure if the pattern would stay when I baked it, but it did!

Only on one side, of course, because rolling the dough out presses it flat on the other side. So the other side got the characteristic “pressed bubble” pita pattern when I flipped it over in the pan.

I used an iron frying pan, and kept a little olive oil and a brush nearby, as well as a wad of napkins for wiping out the oil and flour in between pitas. This keeps the pita from getting blackened residue on it when you cook it.

I was delighted with this pita. It tasted good, too.

I also discovered, about 7/8 of the way through the 16 pieces of pita, that they do puff up if I leave them in the pan about ninety seconds longer than I think I should. This is something I discover every single time I make pita, about 7/8 of the way through. I would trust the process, but I’m too dumb.

The chicken turned out great. The onions are crackly-crisp, the chickpeas are nutty and crunchy with a hot, mealy core, and the chicken has a ridiculously delicious skin, and it’s all set off beautifully by the piquant lemon onions.

I forgot to take a picture, but here is an old one:

It was about 50% tragic that we didn’t have garlicky yogurt sauce to dip everything in, but it was still a pretty good meal. The pita got all eaten up, which made me happy. It’s so embarrassing to make something you think of as a treat, and then have tons and tons of leftovers!

MONDAY
Hammy mac and cheese, raw veg and hummus

On Monday I faced last week’s leftover ham that was still lurking in the fridge. I made two batches of mac and cheese, one plain and once with diced ham. (I don’t really have a recipe; I just made a bunch of white sauce, then shred up any cheese I can find and mix it all up, then stir that up with cooked macaroni, and top it with buttered breadcrumbs and bake it until it’s bubbly. I usually add mustard or hot sauce or both to the cheese sauce, but since I was adding ham, I didn’t think it needed it.)

It was pretty good.

About half of the ham one and half of the cheese one got eaten, so I call that a success.

I also made a tremendous platter of raw vegetables and put that out, along with hummus. My goal is to make a tremendous platter of raw vegetables early in the week every week, and then keep putting it out until it’s gone. This is basically me lately, on the right:

Ol’ Melon Pelvis, they call me. Olllll’ Corn Ulna. Lady Kale Pecs.

TUESDAY
Pork fried rice, egg rolls, raw veg

Tuesday I got the small hunk of pork out of the freezer that I stashed away a few weeks ago, when I made most of it into chili verde. I’m getting better at this “buy what’s on sale and use it all” thing. I cut it into little bits and made some fried rice, using the vegetables I had on hand, which turned out to be peas, carrots, scallions, onions, cabbage, and mushrooms, and of course garlic and ginger.

The ducks are laying reliably again, so I scrambled up three eggs and tossed that in as well.

I guess I’ve made this often enough that I should do a recipe card, so here’s that:

Jump to Recipe

It’s less of a recipe and more of a “recipe,” but I do consult it every time I make this, so it seemed worth making a card!

We also had some frozen egg rolls for Aldi (not bad) and some raw vegetables.

On Tuesday night, I baked a cake and started some gum paste decorations, because I wanted them to be dry by Wednesday.

I even remembered to anchor some toothpicks in them while they were still wet, so they would stay put on the cake. I am a golden god.

WEDNESDAY
Bacon cheeseburgers, fries, birthday cake

Wednesday I had a bunch of errands and cuckoo running around to do in the afternoon, so I got hopping on the cake right away. Mr. Birthday had requested a Shadow the Hedgehog cake, and sent me these reference images:

and I was willing to make a gum paste hedgehog head, hands, and feet, but for some reason I just didn’t want to make a gum paste hedgehog torso. Just didn’t want to do it.

So I looked at the reference images again, and thought I could probably get away with having him busting out of the cake in a sort of explosive . . . exploding cake situation. Couldn’t be simpler!!!

Then I thought, oh, he sent the logo as a separate image, so that must be important. I printed one out and did one of those icing transfer things. You print an image backwards, tape it to the counter, tape parchment paper or wax paper over it, and use a piping bag to trace the image. Then you freeze it, flip it onto your cake, and carefully pull the paper away. Trust the process, right?

Well, this only works if you . . . you know what, never mind. Never mind. All you need to know is that, within half an hour, I was feeling the need to remind myself that I used to be a National Merit Scholar, and lots of people struggle with candy melts, and my hand tremor is not my fault, and if he got a terrible cake it would probably be good for his character in some way. I ended up starting over twice and significantly downgrading my vision, and at the last minute I decided that the logo thingy needed to stand up, rather than lie flat. So I used candy melt to cement a couple of lollipop sticks to the back of the logo.

Then I used more candy melt to color in the feet and head, and then ran out to the store to get some hard candies.

I bashed them up in a bag with a rolling pin and spread them out on parchment paper in a medium oven for a few minutes — one butterscotch with pieces of ruined candy melt logo mixed in, for embers

and one just butterscotch, and I sort of feathered the edges while it was still hot, for flames

Then I let it cool and broke the candy sheets into pieces. Then I had another mental breakdown or two but eventually THIS IS HOW IT TURNED OUT

Shadow the Hedgehog APOCALYPSE. But I didn’t think through the angle of the feet when I was making them, so I had to pipe some little legs on, and it ended up looking like he is sort of angrily lounging in some kind of extremely hot hot tub. I was laughing so hard while I was putting it together. It was at this point that I called Irene over to see my cake, and she said, “Well . . . it has heart!”

Here’s how it looks with 20 candles:

It turns out twenty candles will absolutely melt a candy logo in the time it takes you to sing “Happy Birthday.” Now I know!

Anyway, the birthday boy liked it and, whew.

Damien made the requested bacon cheeseburgers

and some of the adult kids came over and we had a nice time. Whew.

And there was . . . leftover bacon. It’s still in the fridge right now. I really don’t understand.

THURSDAY
Spaghetti with sausage sauce

The plan was just loose sausage and jarred sauce, but I seemed to have a lot of canned tomatoes, so I cooked some diced onion along with the sausage, then broke up the tomatoes and added those in along with some tomato paste and some bay leaves and salt and sugar, and oops, some belated oregano, and some hot pepper flakes. Good enough for the likes of us.

Actually, it was just plain good. This is one of those meals, like whole chicken, that I used to make constantly when we were broke, so I’m kind of sour on it, but every once it a while, on a foggy, rainy day, it’s perfect.

FRIDAY
Pepper and egg sandwiches

We have quite a backlog of duck eggs, so this meal seemed like a good Friday choice.

Beat a bunch of eggs and set them aside. Then chop or slice green peppers and onions and sauté them in olive oil in a large pan for a few minutes, then add a little water, cover the pan, and let them cook gently for several minutes until they are soft. Uncover the pan and cook a few more minutes to let the remaining water evaporate, and then season the peppers and onions with ground pepper and salt. Add in a little more olive oil, then add the beaten eggs and scramble it all up together. Serve on nice rolls. (I think I got potato rolls, but kaiser buns would have been better.) I like mine with a little hot sauce.

Previous egg and pepper sandwiches:

I wish we had fruit salad, but we may have to settle for string beans.

Okay! And that is what we ate!

Couple of food chat odds and ends: One is that I found a perfectly good TAGINE for sale at the thrift store.

A tagine is the name of a variety of North African stews, and also the name of the vessel you cook it in. I, myself, would enjoy something with lamb and pistachios and apricots and nonsense like that, like this restaurant meal we had a few years ago for an anniversary or something:

but I don’t think anyone else would want that. So what would you cook in a tagine?

Second thing is that I recklessly signed up to cook dinner for the youth group, assuming the world would come to and end before the date came up, but it turns out it didn’t. Or at least, it hasn’t yet (fingers crossed for Sunday). It’s only about 20 people. Our current youth says that, if you make anything besides pasta, they laugh at you. I say I don’t mind being laughed at by teenagers, but I actually do. I did just find out that the vegan kids are not going to be there this week, so that’s easier (my plan had been to serve them a hot steaming bowl of Tough Luck anyway).

In the past, for youth group, I have made shawarma, rice pilaf, pita and hummus, and baklava, and then last time we made Marcella Hazan’s three-ingredient sauce on spaghetti, with garlic bread and fruit and salad. I think I’ll just have one large oven to cook or heat food in, otherwise I’d just made a bunch of pizzas. It’s supposed to be a main dish, a side, dessert, and drinks. I may just do stuffed shells, but I’m not happy about it, so if you can think of something relatively cheap that 20 kids would eat without too much scorn, I would love to hear it.

Cumin chicken thighs with chickpeas in yogurt sauce

A one-pan dish, but you won't want to skip the sides. Make with red onions and cilantro in lemon juice, pita bread and yogurt sauce, and pomegranates, grapes, or maybe fried eggplant.

Ingredients

18 chicken thighs
32 oz full fat yogurt, preferably Greek
4 Tbsp lemon juice
3 Tbsp cumin, divided
4-6 cans chickpeas
olive oil
salt and pepper
2 red onions, sliced thinly

For garnishes:

2 red onions sliced thinly
lemon juice
salt and pepper
a bunch fresh cilantro, chopped
32 oz Greek yogurt for dipping sauce
3 cloves garlic, minced or crushed

Instructions

Make the marinade early in the day or the night before. Mix full fat Greek yogurt and with lemon juice, four tablespoons of water, and two tablespoons of cumin, and mix this marinade up with chicken parts, thighs or wings. Marinate several hours.

About an hour before dinner, preheat the oven to 425.

Drain and rinse four or five 15-oz cans of chickpeas and mix them up with a few glugs of olive oil, the remaining tablespoon of cumin, salt and pepper, and two large red onions sliced thin.

Spread the seasoned chickpeas in a single layer on two large sheet pans, then make room among the chickpeas for the marinated chicken (shake or scrape the extra marinade off the chicken if it’s too gloppy). Then it goes in the oven for almost an hour. That’s it for the main part.

The chickpeas and the onions may start to blacken a bit, and this is a-ok. You want the chickpeas to be crunchy, and the skin of the chicken to be a deep golden brown, and crisp. The top pan was done first, and then I moved the other one up to finish browning as we started to eat. Sometimes when I make this, I put the chickpeas back in the oven after we start eating, so some of them get crunchy and nutty all the way through.

Garnishes:

While the chicken is cooking, you prepare your three garnishes:

-Chop up some cilantro for sprinkling if people like.

-Slice another two red onions nice and thin, and mix them in a dish with a few glugs of lemon juice and salt and pepper and more cilantro.

-Then take the rest of the tub of Greek yogurt and mix it up in another bowl with lemon juice, a generous amount of minced garlic, salt, and pepper.

Basic stir fried rice

This is a very loose recipe, because you can change the ingredients and proportions however you like

Ingredients

cooked rice
sesame oil (or plain cooking oil)
fresh garlic and ginger, minced
vegetables, diced or shredded (onion, scallion, peas, bok choy, carrots, sugar snap peas, cabbage, etc.)
brown sugar
raw or cooked shrimp, or raw or cooked meat (pork, ham, chicken), diced
soy sauce
oyster sauce
fish sauce
eggs

Instructions

In a very large pan, heat up a little oil and sauté the ginger and garlic for a few minutes. If you are using raw meat, season it with garlic powder and ginger powder and a little soy sauce, add it to the pan, and cook it through. If you are using shrimp, just throw it in the pan and cook it.
Add in the chopped vegetables and continue cooking until they are cooked through. If you are using cooked meat, add it now.
Add the brown sugar and cook, stirring, until the brown sugar is bubbly and darkened.
Add in the cooked rice and stir until everything is combined.
Add in a lot of oyster sauce, a medium amount of soy sauce, and a little fish sauce, and stir to combine completely.
In a separate pan, scramble the eggs and stir them in. (Some people scramble the eggs directly into the rest of the rice, but I find it difficult to cook the eggs completely this way.)
If you are using cooked shrimp, add it at the end and just heat it through.

How to make chocolate caramel almonds without panicking

When we manage to make treats for Christmas, we usually make fudge and buckeyes, sometimes rum balls or peanut brittle, and of course rugelach. Last year, looking for something a little more decorative, I tried chocolate caramelized almonds from Smitten Kitchen. You don’t need a candy thermometer to make them, and you can use whatever kind of sugar or sprinkles you like, so they are adaptable gifts for just about any holiday.

Here’s the ingredients list from Smitten Kitchen:

1 cup granulated sugar
1/2 cup water
1 1/2 cup whole almonds
1/2 teaspoon flaky salt
8 ounces semisweet chocolate chips
Approximately 1/2 cup cocoa powder, sanding or coarse sugar, or sprinkles to coat

You will want a good, heavy pot and some parchment paper or silicone pads for this, too.

I’m trying very hard not to run afoul of recipe copyright laws here, so I’m going to send you right to her page to get the detailed directions. Basically you put sugar and water in a pot and bring it to a simmer, add the almonds and simmer them until they’re caramelized, stir in the salt, and then spread the almonds out on a pan covered with parchment paper.

Put the pan in the freezer for a few minutes until they are set. Then break them up and dip them in melted chocolate; then roll the chocolate-coated almonds in various fancy coatings. Let them set again, and then you can store them for quite a long time at room temperature.

Here’s my reason for writing a whole post about it: In the detailed instructions for caramelizing the almonds, she says,

“Once the liquid has fully evaporated, it will become sandy and you will think something has gone wrong; it has not. Continue stirring and the sandiness will dissolve into a bronzed but clear liquid; this is the caramel.”

I was glad of the reassurance, and prepared myself not to freak out. But then! I freaked out anyway! Weird stuff happens in that pot!!! So I’m sharing the photos of the caramelization process here, so you can see how it goes and maybe not panic like I did.

Here we are simmering, fine, very good:

then it got thicker, and yes, there are soap-like bubbles forming:

the the liquid was just about evaporated, and all was well:

then, sure enough, it started to get dry and a little bit cakey, and I was like, “Wow, she was right! That is sandy.”

Then it got dry and even more sandy, and I thought, “Good thing she warned me, because this does not look normal at all. I would definitely be worrying right now.”

Then this happened. And it went on and on. Just kept on being sandy. I didn’t stop stirring, but it was the stirring of futility. I assumed the candy gods were onto me, and knew I had no business in any kitchen, smitten or otherwise. Look at this!

Yeah, these are totally ruined. Great, now they’re clumping. No one said anything about clumping. Dammit. Almonds are expensive! Dammit!

But wait! Down there in the center of the pot, under all the nuts, there’s a little, kind of syrupy patch!

Well, hallelujah! Those little bastiches are caramelizing after all, aren’t they.

And there they were, coated with caramel, just like Smitten Kitchen said. So I put them on parchment paper, slid them in the freezer, and went to sit down for a bit.

I was so emotionally spent by this time that I left them in the freezer for a few days, rather than the suggested five minutes, until I did the next step. I don’t recommend this, as they got a little soggy; but you will be the best judge of what kind of load you can carry at this point in the evening. It still worked, but they weren’t as crunchy as they might have been.

Now I’ll send you back to Smitten Kitchen for the rest of the directions. You’re going to pour the nuts into melted chocolate, stir to coat, and then pick out the almonds and roll them around in your sugars or sprinkles or whatever. It’s messy and time-consuming, especially if you’re making a large batch, so don’t think you can just zoop-zoop-zoop (as my mother used to say) and be done with it.

The good news is, you can make them ahead of time and then store them at room temperature for a long time. Here’s the finished product:

I wish I had a brighter picture of the finished product. They were so pretty, especially the sugar-coated ones! They looked like little Christmas gems. (I buy up expensive seasonal-themed sugars and sprinkles after holidays, when they are marked way down. This doesn’t work, as the kids tend to develop an unconquerable hunger for tiny little bats in May, but it’s a good theory.)

I think these almonds make nice treats on their own, or they would make lovely accents to a package of fudge or cookies. Just keep telling yourself, “It’s supposed to look this way,” and you’ll probably be right.

What’s for supper? Vol. 65: The importance of being parchment paper

Ooh, I’m in such a hurry! We’re headed out for a day trip as vacation week wraps up. I’ll just have to talk about food and skip the jokes, to save time.

SATURDAY
Chicken burgers

We decorate the tree on Christmas eve, and then we went to “midnight Mass” at 10 PM. Part of me was sad and a little irritated that the parish wasn’t giving us our rare and special twice-a-year midnight liturgy this year; but the other part was like, HOME BEFORE MIDNIGHT, WOOOOO! Because we did manage to get all forty presents wrapped, but there were still ten stockings to fill . . .

SUNDAY
Christmas brunch; Pupu Platter for 15

Our traditional Christmas morning brunch is cinnamon rolls, bacon, grapes, orange juice, and egg nog.

Tip: The way to keep kids from drinking egg nog until they throw up is . . . buy tiny cups. Cheers!

I made Pioneer Woman’s cinnamon roll dough the day before, and rolled out the rolls in the morning.

I made a double recipe, which was insane. I make this same mistake every year. We ended up throwing out both unused dough and uneaten cinnamon buns, and we brought a pan to my mother-in-law’s house, too.

We ordered Chinese from the restaurant down the road. We used to do the whole “Thanksgiving recreation” meal, or sometimes a glazed ham with cherries and pineapple rings, until we realized nobody wanted a huge, formal meal, and also it was kind of crappy that everyone else gets to relax and have fun on Christmas, but I was spending all day cooking. So, Pupu platter!

MONDAY
Leftover chinese food, leftover chicken burgers

Plus some extra frozen pork rolls my husband picked up because he is crazy. I also threw in some sad peppers and avocados I found in the fridge, because it felt like we hadn’t eaten vegetables in six years. Somehow the vegetables are always the first to drop out.

Finished making caramel chocolate-covered almonds from Smitten Kitchen today. This project had been lagging on and on for weeks. We eked out a few batches in time to give to teachers, and finally finished the rest on Monday.

If anyone’s interested, I have a series of photos showing exactly what the caramel should look like while it’s cooking. It goes through an alarming series of transformations, all of which are normal. Just say the word and I will share the pics.

I made the first few batches right, but then I got lazy and didn’t separate the caramelized almonds properly. So I just broke it up into clusters, rather than individual almonds and dipped those into chocolate, which was way easier and faster and just as good. I thought the gold sugar was especially pretty.

This recipe could be used for any time of year — just change the colors of sugar and sprinkles you use.

TUESDAY
Hamburgers, chips

Husband ran out to the store for meat while we all lazed around eating chocolate and playing video games.
We also made stained glass cookies, on the principle that it is better to make Christmas cookies late and slightly crabby then not to make Christmas cookies at all. We used this foolproof sugar cookie recipe for the dough. Then we sorted out some Jolly Ranchers by color, bagged them, and smashed them.

Then we cut them out and used smaller cookie cutters or knives to make cut-outs inside the cookie shapes. You’re supposed to bake the cookies part of the way, then fill them with candy bits, and then finish baking, but I forgot, and filled them before baking.

They turned out great! Note the parchment paper.

Look, I even made a corny pro-life cookie.

That baby head-to-pelvis ratio is pretty accurate for Corrie, as I remember it.
Irene, of course, made a skull with glowing red eyes:

Murry Christmas, weirdo. The key to the success of this recipe is, and I cannot stress this enough, USE PARCHMENT PAPER. Not wax paper, and not (brrr, your poor molars) tin foil. Parchment paper. If you don’t have parchment paper, do not make these cookies!

WEDNESDAY
Bacon, Brussels sprouts, and eggs; french fries

How I love this one-pan dish from Damn Delicious. It would make a wonderful brunch, but I think it’s super for supper, too. Bacon needs balsamic honey, eggs need hot pepper, and everyone plays well with Brussels sprouts, what do you know about that?

I had microwaved leftovers for breakfast the next day, and had a banner day for productivity. I owe it all to protein, and Brussels sprouts. Even kinda congealed, it was so very good.

THURSDAY
Spaghetti and meatballs, salad

I stuck with Fannie Farmer’s recipe for meatballs, which is basically one egg and half a cup of breadcrumbs for every pound of meat, plus whatever spices and herbs. I used about 6.5 pounds of beef and a little ground turkey, and made 85 wonderful meatballs. Rather than frying them, I put them on a broiler pan and cook them in a medium-hot oven. They keep their shape and don’t get all greasy, and it’s so much easier.

Yum yum. We were pretty much snowed in all day, so I was happy to have a very hearty meal.

Speaking of snowed in, here is my recipe for completely delicious hot chocolate: Put into a pot one heaping tablespoon of cocoa powder and two heaping tablespoons of sugar for every mug of hot chocolate you want. Add enough water to make a thick syrup, and mix over low heat until the sugar is all melted. Then add the milk and a glug of vanilla. Stir and heat until it’s hot.

Benny insisted on drinking out of her doll tea set. As I mentioned before, the key to success and happiness in life is and always will be TINY CUPS.

FRIDAY
I think pizza.

And now my poor family is waiting for me in the car! Happy trails. Hope you are all having a wonderful Christmas and using parchment paper like I said. I’m not kidding.