This week starts so well.
But, dear reader, read on.
SATURDAY
Italian sandwiches, fries
Always a tasty option. A variety of cured meats from the deli, some jarred pesto, olive oil and vinegar, basil and tomatoes, and plenty of fries.
And cheese! Do not forget the cheese.
SUNDAY
Bagel, bacon, egg, cheese sandwiches, OJ
Ran out of eggs; was not sad to have to send a kid to go get some fresh local eggs, some with those lovely blue shells. Fresh eggs just fry up different, especially in bacon fat.
I set a timer for eighty seconds to toast the bagels in the oven, and immediately forgot they were in there, so if you were wondering how quickly I can forget something, it’s much shorter than eighty seconds.
This reminds me of a joke Irene once told when she was four, when she owned a riddle book and would adjust most of the jokes to make them funnier:
Still some chances to eat outside. The hummingbirds have departed, though.
On Sunday I also made two batches of ice cream for Monday, as I will describe shortly.
MONDAY
Smoked pork ribs, coleslaw, grapes; homemade ice cream
Monday was Labor Day, and the two moved-out kids came by for dinner, which was lovely. Damien smoked three racks of pork ribs for several hours using his sugar rub and Sweet Baby Ray’s sauce. (This recipe says “chicken thighs,” but it’s the same rub)
Jump to RecipeAn absolute pile of luscious, juicy, tender ribs, so good. Lena made a bowl of wonderfully tart coleslaw and I contributed by washing off some grapes.
We all liked the ribs, but Corrie really enjoyed them.
Then for dessert, we had ice cream sundaes. I made two kinds of ice cream: Chocolate and Lucky Charms. I just now had to google “Marshmallow Mateys vs” to remember the phrase “Lucky Charms,” because my brain is too smooth to remember the name of rich person’s cereal at this late date.
I followed the recipe at We Are Not Martha because they told a sad story about how they once got picked up by Bon Appétit but now the food blogging world is clogged with Pinterest copycats and people who put all their effort into photography, and I guess I have a soft spot for people who lead with a kvetch.
The recipe was fairly labor intensive, because they are trying to get the taste of cereal without including actual cereal, which would be gross. So you have to infuse some milk with Lucky Charms cereal for half an hour, then strain out the cereal
and then use that milk to make a custard
Any time I use a thermometer in a recipe, I feel so put-upon. I feel like I’m using a bellows or an Erlenmeyer flask or forceps or something. Of course this was all 100% my idea, but never ind. I have the ability to create resentment against nobody at all, out of thin air, and to sustain it for hours. So you whisk and heat this custard and then mix it with heavy cream and push it through a sieve again, cover it with plastic wrap, and chill it for four hours. And then you can actually put it in your ice cream machine.
I churned it for thirty minutes, then added some marshmallow fluff and the marshmallows I suddenly realized I needed to pick out of the remaining box of cereal; and then I refrigerated it overnight. I have to admit, it turned out great. It’s very cute ice cream. The ice cream has a very cozy, custard-y taste that absolutely reminds you of watching cartoons on a Saturday morning, which is something I don’t think I ever actually did. We did not have a TV when I was growing up. I remember once my father brought home a film projector from the college where he worked, and he tacked up a sheet on the living room sliding doors and we watched Koyaanisqatsi, and that’s why I am the way I am.
The marshmallows softened slightly, but some of them still had that peculiar cereal marshmallow crunch. I skipped the sauce and whipped cream and just had ice cream with a cherry.
I also made chocolate ice cream, which I somehow haven’t made yet, in all our ice cream-making adventures. I was reading over the various recipes and Corrie was looking over my shoulder and reading the little recipe descriptions.
It was delicious, though. I already had a migraine, so I had a spoonful, and it was very rich, like the ice cream version of very good hot chocolate. And that mouthfeel! Superb.
TUESDAY
Taco Tuesday!
Back to school. My car mysteriously broke down, so we had to do a rigamarole with borrowed cars to get everyone to school. I shalln’t keep you in suspense: We just got the call today that my car will need an ennnnntirrrrreee newwwww enginnnnne. Yes this is my “nice” “new” car, which I took out a loan to pay for for the first time in my life, which I have had for less than a year and a half, and which already required, among other major repairs, a new t i m i n g c h a i n, which takes twenty hours of labor. My feelings about the car are . . . not very mouthfeel, let me tell you.
Unless you would like to buy it from me. In which case it’s a great little vehicle, very clean, hardly driven. DM me.
Anyway, we had tacos.
WEDNESDAY
Chicken shawarma with pita and yogurt sauce
On Tuesday, because I was carless at home, I decided to prep Wednesday’s meal ahead of time, so I marinated the shawarma meat. Then on Wednesday, all I had to do was cut up some cucumbers, wash a bunch of little tomatoes, chop up some parsley, make a batch of yogurt sauce
Jump to Recipeopen a bunch of cans and bottles of various kinds of olives, cut up a bunch of feta, pile up a bunch of pita bread, and slice up a bunch of onions. I’m making it sound like a lot, but it’s like 20 minutes of work, and the rest is just fishing the meat out of the marinade where it has been resting all night,
Jump to Recipespreading it in a pan, festooning it with onions, and cooking it just nicely. This is such a low-skill, high-reward meal. Look at this lovely chicken. I included some breasts, some thighs. Red onions are better than yellow, but it’s all good. The thighs are the superior meat for this dish, but it’s all good.
And here’s my lovely tasty plate.
Just a fantastic meal. Everybody likes at least a few elements of this meal, and several people like every last bit of it. Everyone’s happy on shawarma night.
THURSDAY
Pulled pork, cheesy cabbage, hash browns
On Thursday I industriously got the pork into the slow cooker bright an early. I added half a liter of Coke, some onion quarters, a few chopped jalapeños, and bunch of cumin, salt, and pepper, and I set it to low and went away happy.
Several hours later, I realized Suzy Homemaker here never plugged the damn thing in.
Luckily, the Coke was very cold and the crock pot kept it chilled, so the meat was okay. I moved it all to the Instant Pot and pressure cooked it on high for 22 minutes, then moved it back to the slow cooker for the rest of the day. Came out looking promising.
and it shredded well enough.
I had been planning coleslaw, but I’m a little tired of coleslaw, so I looked up other cabbage recipes, and guess what? They all suck. The only one that seemed remotely tasty was a kind of au gratin idea, with a cheese sauce and maybe a buttered crumb topping. But I was caught between some obnoxiously high brow recipes that called for gruyere and heavy cream and braising, and some distressingly trashy ones that wanted you to smother the whole thing with Cheez Wiz and top it with Ritz crackers. Caught between two worlds, story of my life, very tragic.
So I ended up cutting the cabbage into eight wedges, drizzling it with olive oil and salting and peppering it, and roasting it for about 45 minutes. Then I made a white sauce and added in plenty of various kinds of cheese, plus paprika, nutmeg, and salt and pepper. This I spread over the roasted cabbage, and topped it with crunchy fried onions and parsley. Then I baked it in a high oven for about 20 minutes until the cheese was melted.
It was disgusting. Never making this again. I don’t know what I was thinking. Cabbage can go screw.
Here’s a nice picture I took before I tasted it.
I mean it was not the worst thing I’ve ever had in my face. But the cabbage was underdone and the cheese only reached the top layer, so most of it was just plain cabbage; and the cheese sauce had a flavor I can only describe as . . . bricky. It tasted like if you ground up a brick and tried to pass it off as seasoning, with cheese. Maybe put some pennies in there. I don’t know what happened.
I also served some hash browns. Well, that was the plan. I bought four bags of what it said were hash browns (and this may actually explain what was up with the freezer. That is too many bags), but which turned out to be just straight up shredded potatoes, nothing else. Which is fine, but look, I don’t know, I guess I can’t read. I definitely cannot think. By this time the sun was low in the sky and I was already worried about the cabbage, not to mention the demoralizing Suzy Homemaker situation, so I just spread the potato shreds in a pan, drizzled it with oil, and sprinkled it with salt, and cooked it at a high heat until some of it was burnt and some of it was pale and limp, and it was just going to have to do. Good grief. We did have some leftover Baby Ray’s sauce and everyone was very nice about it.
FRIDAY
We have two different school cookouts that we’re supposed to be at, and we were going to try to split up and go to both, IF the mechanic was done with my car by now. And you know how that story ends! It ends well! My car is diagnosed as having a terminal case of cheesy cabbage and there is no hope. Oh well, maybe there’s some ice cream left.
Speaking of ice cream, this weekend I intend to hide from reality and spend my time picking the millions of concord grapes we grew for some reason, make some grape juice, and see about making grape gelato. The only reason people don’t make grape gelato more often is that they are cowards, I’m sure of it.
God save the queen.
Smoked chicken thighs with sugar rub
Ingredients
- 1.5 cups brown sugar
- .5 cups white sugar
- 2 Tbsp chili powder
- 2 Tbsp garlic powder
- 2 tsp chili pepper flakes
- salt and pepper
- 20 chicken thighs
Instructions
-
Mix dry ingredients together. Rub all over chicken and let marinate until the sugar melts a bit.
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Light the fire, and let it burn down to coals. Shove the coals over to one side and lay the chicken on the grill. Lower the lid and let the chicken smoke for an hour or two until they are fully cooked.
Jerry's Chocolate Ice Cream
This is the more textured chocolate ice cream from the Ben and Jerry's ice cream recipe book. It has a rich, dusky chocolate flavor and texture. Makes 2 quarts. This recipe requires some chill time before you put the cream mixture into the machine.
Ingredients
- 4 oz unsweetened chocolate
- 2/3 cup cocoa powder
- 3 cups milk
- 4 eggs
- 2 cups sugar
- 2 cups heavy or whipping cream
- 2 tsp vanilla extract
Instructions
-
Melt the unsweetened chocolate. I used a double boiler, but you can use a microwave if you're careful. Whisk in the cocoa and continue heating until it's smooth. It's okay if it's clumpy. Continue heating and whisk in the milk gradually until it's all blended together. Remove from heat and let cool.
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In another bowl, whisk, the eggs until light and fluffy. Gradually whisk in the sugar and continue whisking until completely blended. Add in the cream and vanilla and continue whisking until blended.
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Add the chocolate mixture into the cream mixture and stir to blend. Cover and refrigerate for about three hours, or until it is cold.
-
Use the cold mixture in your ice cream machine. I used my Cuisinart and let it churn for thirty minutes, then let it cure overnight.
Chicken shawarma
Ingredients
- 8 lbs boned, skinned chicken thighs
- 4-5 red onions
- 1.5 cups lemon juice
- 2 cups olive oil
- 4 tsp kosher salt
- 2 Tbs, 2 tsp pepper
- 2 Tbs, 2 tsp cumin
- 1 Tbsp red pepper flakes
- 1 tsp cinnamon
- 1 entire head garlic, crushed
Instructions
-
Mix marinade ingredients together, then add chicken. Put in ziplock bag and let marinate several hours or overnight.
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Preheat the oven to 425.
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Grease a shallow pan. Take the chicken out of the marinade and spread it in a single layer on the pan, and top with the onions (sliced or quartered). Cook for 45 minutes or more.
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Chop up the chicken a bit, if you like, and finish cooking it so it crisps up a bit more.
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Serve chicken and onions with pita bread triangles, cucumbers, tomatoes, assorted olives, feta cheese, fresh parsley, pomegranates or grapes, fried eggplant, and yogurt sauce.
Yogurt sauce
Ingredients
- 32 oz full fat Greek yogurt
- 5 cloves garlic, crushed
- 1/4 cup lemon juice
- 3 Tbsp olive oil
- 1 tsp salt
- 1/2 tsp pepper
- fresh parsley or dill, chopped (optional)
Instructions
-
Mix all ingredients together. Use for spreading on grilled meats, dipping pita or vegetables, etc.
My dad lived for a surprisingly long time as a poor grad student on a weird salad made of shredded cabbage, carrot, lemon juice and light cottage cheese. It’s gross and he still eats it occasionally now like a weirdo.
My favourite cabbage salad is a Chinese inspired crunchy noodle salad.
Best done with wombok but can be done with a regular cabbage, shred it with fine chopped scallions/spring onions, slivered almonds (optional), a little cilantro/coriander and then dress with a sesame oil and rice wine vinegar and garlic dressing (needs a little white sugar to balance) then add some packet crunch noodles last minute. It tastes good the next day too except for the soggy noodles…
Leaving a probably-unhelpful two cents about what else to do with cabbage. I used rice vinegar instead of champagne vinegar, and maybe dried parsley like a monster (but fresh basil is the only plant I’m successfully growing this summer, so that part worked out):
https://www.twopeasandtheirpod.com/crispy-artichoke-white-bean-salad/
I’m so sorry about your car. We’re feeling the pain here too (different reason, same kick in the wallet).
In related news, I have introduced my sons to 70’s cuisine, which for the most part is completely carb-laden, unhealthy junk, but the boys have actually commented how tasty and filling they find it, although even they acknowledge they feel like crap compared to eating a meal consisting primarily of meat and veggies. I’ve found several dinners well under 1 dollar per person: mac and cheese with bacon bits, homemade cream of chicken soup over rice, and chipped beef over mashed potatoes (from the garden). Next up: Jello Molds!
The film thing was so funny I read it to my husband and we both laughed.
Sorry about the car.
Here is a delicious way to use up headfulls of cabbage, deliciously: https://cupofjo.com/2021/09/29/six-fall-vegetables/
Cut up some bacon, get it frying until you have a good amount of grease, toss in cabbage cut into strips and sprinkle with plenty of pepper.
Simple, unhealthy, but not too bad.
I also use it a lot in Chinese food.
Cabbage can definitely go screw. My husband signed us up for that Misfit Market thing, and they sent us a giant cabbage, a quarter of which I used for a chicken tortilla salad that would have been delicious with iceberg or romaine. I will eat the rest of the salad, but I don’t know what to do with the rest of the cabbage, or the one that arrived today. Weekly deliveries are way too frequent if they are going to stick us with cabbages.
This isn’t exactly quick, but have you tried making sauerkraut? It’s super easy and it keeps really well.
Oh, you have my full sympathy over the car. So much sympathy. The exact same thing happened to me, and I won’t say how long it took to get the new engine. Making my own car payment on my own for the first time in my 50 years wasn’t nearly as much fun when I didn’t have my own car.
Anyway. I’m so sorry.
Thank you. This is the most I have ever paid for a car AND the most I have ever paid to fix a car. It just ain’t right! And I hate so many details about it. It’s not even fun to drive. It whines constantly. The whole entire dashboard glares in my eyes. You can’t open only one window, or it makes this horrible sound and it feels like your eardrums are going to explode. The heating vents aren’t even, so one side of your body gets much hotter than the other. The sound system is terrible. It has a laughably small storage space. It’s just a rotten car altogether.
I’m heartened that I am not the only migraine sufferer who, when having a migraine, goes ahead and has something that is a known trigger anyway. I mean, I’m already writhing in pain, why not have something nice?
On a related note, my migraines got a lot less intense and less frequent when I started taking acetyl l-carnitine, ALA, and CoQ10. I know that sounds woo, but they’re also good for heart health and lowering blood pressure, and the other day I completely forgot about taking them in the morning, as I usually do, and just the sunshine bouncing off the concrete patio outside my window gave me a headache. So I’m rolling with it.