What’s for supper? Vol. 485: Rusty dipthongs and greasy ennui. And guacamole!

Happy Friday! One must imagine Simcha saying something poignant here, something amusing and a little bit weird, making a captivating opening for this week’s food post. Then she will say something like: Here’s what we ate this week!

Oh, here is a picture of the “four to six quarts” of grape juice I expected to get out of the grapes I processed last week. About half a gallon. Thanks a lot, Obama. 

Anyway, I made grape juice, which makes Corrie happy. 

I will say that the tiramisu cake I made for Clara turned out well! I was following the Betty Crocker recipe but wanted a round cake I could serve without a baking dish, so I made it in a springform pan, used some of the ladyfingers to make a fence around the outside, and added gelatin to the top layer of egg white as I whipped it, so I could pipe it on top and it would keep its shape. I skipped the cocoa (because we were out and I had already sent Sophia to the store twice); and I added sugared raspberries and a dust of edible gold powder. And it was lovely!

I refrigerated it for nearly 24 hours before serving, it, and it held up great.

I’m really glad to know that the gelatin thing works for keeping piped whipped cream in shape. Will be VERY handy if I sell pies for Thanksgiving again this year. 

I wrote up all the adjustments I made into a recipe card, which may or may not be coherent, but it sure is long. 

Jump to Recipe

I don’t think I included the directions for sugared raspberries, but you just whip up some egg whites until they are foamy, brush them on dry raspberries with a pastry brush, roll the raspberries in sugar, and let them dry for several hours. They get a little sweet, crackly crust, and they are sparkly. Very nice dessert accent. My general advice is to make at least twice as many as you need, because about half of them get weepy and don’t look great. 

SATURDAY
Leftover delite and ??

Saturday, Damien did part of the shopping and I splurged on an Instacart order for the rest. I think the chosen frozen food was loaded potato skins. 

 

SUNDAY
Grilled cheese, sorta caprese pasta salad

Sunday, half of us were felled by some respiratory virus going around. Corrie came into my room to languish with me, and she got bored pretty fast, but didn’t like any of the activities I suggested . . . until I offered to teach her how to write phonetically in ancient Greek. Eleven is the PERFECT age for this kind of thing. She loves codes and secret languages, and she’s smart as heck, so off she went. I wonder if I still have my old Luschnig workbook hanging around somewhere! My dipthongs are rusty. 

In the afternoon, I sent her out to pick a bunch of basil, and made a simple pasta salad. I had replenished my rennet supply and briefly considered making some mozzarella skulls, but that seemed like a bridge too far, so it was just pasta, chopped tomatoes, basil, lots of olive oil, some red wine vinegar, kosher salt, pepper, and fresh garlic. 

Always popular. 

The main dish was supposed to be grilled ham and cheese, but the ham had vanished without a trace, and I’m still very much in “okay I have five energy and I used up four of them just getting into the kitchen” territory, so I didn’t look too hard. Made a bunch of grilled cheese and that was that. 

The kids remembered we had refrigerator pickles, so that was a little perk. 

If your pickles don’t look like they were violently captured from a bog, what are you even doing? 

MONDAY
Buffalo chicken wraps, chips

Monday, Damien once again drove me to Lebanon for a neurology visit! This is the final in-person post surgery visit I should need, and she doctor said it looks like healing is going great. My incision looks good, the ridges and divots in my head are normal, I could cancel the upcoming MRI and just schedule one for six months from now, and best of all, I could start weaning off Keppra, which is the anti-seizure medicine which has been keeping me stoopid and wobbly. AND, the pathology report says it was definitively a benign tumor. (I figured it must be, since they always give you bad news fast; but it was nice to hear officially!)

Oh, and she said I could start taking ibuprofen again, which was great. I really missed ibuprofen. Mainly because my body shrimply does not care if we are nearly 52 years old and recovering from a craniotomy; we are still going to keep on cycling, cycling, and cycling, until the ennnnnd of the world. But at least now we have ibuprofen again. 

Got back in town around 5, picked up the kids, and had buffalo chicken wraps for supper. We have been abstaining from lettuce and fresh herbs all this time, for fear of cyclosporiasis, but, feeling reckless and celebratory, I put lettuce on my wraps. So it was frozen buffalo chicken tenders, lettuce, tomato, shredded pepper jack cheese, and blue cheese dressing. 

And nobody died of the shits! The kids had chips, but I am once again making an effort to Stop Being So Fat, so I skipped the chips. I spent a whole month hardly eating anything but soup, so I should actually be incredibly thin by now, but I refer you to the fact that I’m almost 52 and my body is really dumb. Anyway, I skipped the chips. 

Also, I cleaned the kitchen! Monday is my day to clean the kitchen, and I hadn’t done so for quite some time. Felt great. 

TUESDAY
Chili verde, rice, guacamole and chips

On Tuesday afternoon, I convinced Damien that, because I was weaning off Keppra, I could drive again, so I drove to pick up the kids while he chaperoned. And it went great, until we got home and it was time to park, and I hit Sophia’s car. Then later he told me the rest of the driving was also not as great as I thought, and he took the keys back again. DAMMIT. Slow breathing, patience, grouse grouse grouse. We can try again when the Keppra is all out of my system, next week. 

Anyway, I made some chili verde. Part of why I don’t like Instacart shopping is because you can’t really pick the meat, and I guess I ordered pork chops, rather than a loin or a shoulder or something. So I ended up cutting the meat off the bone and, predictably, it was a little tougher than you really want the pork to be for a chili, but whatever. It tasted fine. Here’s my recipe.

Jump to Recipe

I also made some guacamole, and I kept seeing this video where this woman says everyone misunderstands guacamole, mashing the avocados and then adding stuff to it. Indeed, that is how I do it. Instead, she says you should crush up all the non-avocado ingredients, and then add chopped avocados into that. Actually, I didn’t watch the video. I don’t know what she said. 

Nevertheless, I went ahead and tried what I imagined the video said. I was too sleepy to use a mortar and pestle, so I just threw the onions, garlic, cilantro, and jalapeño into the food processor with a little olive oil to help things along

and then I chopped 3-4 avocados and mixed it together, along with salt, pepper, and lime juice. 

Tasted good to me! It wasn’t necessarily better or worse than the way I usually do it, but it was good. Maybe someday I’ll even watch the video. 

I had my chili over rice with sour cream, more cilantro, and a lime wedge, and it was a yummy meal. 

I sure missed cilantro! I missed chips, too. (Gloomily counted out exactly seven, which is apparently one serving.) I’m starting to get more feeling back in my mouth, so this was a careful experiment as I refamiliarize myself with the left half of my head. 

WEDNESDAY
Pizza

Wednesday I sulked my way through a bunch of paperwork that I was pretty sure I had already submitted, but who knows. Made three pizzas, one pepperoni, one olive, and one cheese. And that really is too much pizza for our family size! I forgot how few we are these days, alas. 

THURSDAY
Ina Garten’s roast chicken; brussels sprouts and butternut squash

We had this same chicken recipe last week, but la creativity, she is at an all-time low. It’s easy and relatively popular and cheap, so that’s what we went with. Garlic and lemons, salt and pepper inside; butter, salt, and pepper outside, and the chicken roasts on top of a layer of carrots and onions. I skipped the thyme. 

I had some butternut squash and brussels sprouts, too, so I roasted them in a separate pan with olive oil, salt, pepper, garlic powder, and a little honey, and then got involved with helping Irene edit a scholarship essay and burned the hell out of the vegetables, oh well. The chicken was good! 

Good essay, too. Somebody give that kid $60,000 stat!

I also got a wild hare and sorta kinda fixed the dining room storage bench, which fell apart a few weeks ago and has been sitting there with its guts hanging out, collecting candy wrappers and used tissues and generalized greasy ennui. I did a truly terrible job, and I will definitely need to redo it later, but I did use a power drill without killing myself, so that counts for something. And you can sit on the bench again, so there.

I’m sorry to be so whiny, I am just SO TIRED OF NOT BEING ABLE TO DO ANYTHING OR GO ANYWHERE OR GET ANYTHING DONE. Bah. Bah, I tell you! Bah, and boo. 

FRIDAY
Spaghetti

Just regular old, begular old spaghetti. This weekend, I am hoping to dig up the potatoes I grew, and maybe get some marigold, cosmos, and sunflower seeds collected. I guess the pumpkins are probably as big as they’re going to get (not very big; something went wrong right after they fruited), so we might as well pick those, too. I just let the unpicked corn languish, so I guess they are fancy bird feeders now. Oh well.

I was extremely holy for a while there, and was offering stuff up left and right, but now I’ve reverted to just whining. As you may have noticed.

Anyway, excelsior, or whatever. Damien actually won another journalism award! He is having quite a year. I regretfully told him I didn’t think I could come see him get it, because being in the car is just too hard. But hooray for awards! He should win an award for putting up with all my complaining, honestly.

And so should all of you. 

Spicy Chili Verde

You can decrease the heat by seeding the peppers, using fewer habañeros, or substituting some milder pepper. It does get less spicy as it cooks, so don't be alarmed if you make the salsa and it's overwhelming!

Ingredients

  • 5 lbs pork shoulder
  • salt and pepper
  • oil for cooking
  • 2 cups chicken broth or beer (optional)

For the salsa verde:

  • 4 Anaheim peppers
  • 2 habañero peppers
  • 4 jalapeño peppers
  • 4 medium onions, quartered
  • 12 tomatillos
  • 1 head garlic, cloves peeled or unpeeled
  • 1 bunch cilantro

For serving:

  • lime wedges
  • sour cream
  • additional cilantro for topping

Instructions

  1. Preheat the broiler.

  2. Pull the husks and stems off the tomatillos and rinse them. Cut the ends off all the peppers. Grease a large pan and put the tomatillos, peppers, and onions on it. Broil five minutes, turn, and broil five minutes more, until they are slightly charred.

  3. When they are cool enough to handle, you can at this point remove the seeds from the peppers to decrease the spiciness, if you want. If you roasted the garlic in its peel, just squeeze the insides out and discard the peels.

  4. Put the tomatillos, peppers, garlic and onions in a food processor or blender with the garlic and cilantro. Purée.

  5. In a heavy pot, heat some oil. Salt and pepper the pork chunks and brown them in the oil. You will need to do it in batches so the pork has enough room and browns, rather than simmering.

  6. When all the meat is browned, return it all to the pot and add the puréed ingredients.

  7. Simmer at a low heat for at least three hours until the meat is tender. If you want thinner chili verde, stir in the chicken broth or beer. If you don't want the pork in large chunks, press the meat with the back of a spoon to make it collapse into shreds.

  8. Spoon the chili verde into bowls, squeeze some lime juice over the top, and top with sour cream and fresh cilantro.

tiramisu cake

This is a large, festive cake that yields 12-14 generous slices. Traditionally, it would have rum or amaretto mixed into the espresso, and cocoa powder sifted over the top (or shaved chocolate). I skip both of these, and it's still spectacular; but feel free to add them back in.

Tiramisu needs at least four to six hours to chill and for the flavor to develop and for the ladyfingers to soften. If you're going to eat it within this time frame, you can save yourself some trouble and construct and serve it inside a rectangular baking dish, which is easier, if less decorative. If you want a round tiramisu cake that can be served on its own with a decorative, piped top, you will need to let it chill at least overnight to hold together, and you will need to add gelatin to the top layer of whipped cream to stabilize the piping.

Ingredients

  • 12 egg yolks
  • 1-1/2 cups sugar
  • 1-1/3 cups milk
  • 2 lbs mascarpone at room temperature
  • 1-1/2 cups heavy cream
  • 2+2 tsp vanilla extract and/or almond extract
  • 1/2 cup espresso, chilled
  • 14 oz ladyfingers
  • 1-1/2 tsp unflavored gelatin powder (optional, for stabilizing whipped cream)

Instructions

  1. In a mug or small bowl, mix together the espresso, the first 2 tsp of vanilla/almond extract (and rum or amaretto, if you're using it). Set aside.

  2. In a heavy pot, whisk together the egg yolks and sugar. Whisk in the milk. Heat up at medium, whisking constantly, until mixture begins to boil. Turn heat to low and continue whisking for two minutes.

  3. Remove from heat, pour the egg mixture into a bowl, cover with plastic wrap so wrap comes into direct contact with the mixture. Chill for an hour or more, until it is thoroughly cool.

  4. While this mixture is chilling, also chill a mixing bowl in preparation for whipping.

  5. When the egg mixture is cool, add mascarpone and beat with an electric mixer on medium until it is smooth.

  6. HERE YOU HAVE TWO OPTIONS!

    If you are planning to serve the tiramisu in a few hours, I recommend constructing the tiramisu in six layers (ladyfingers, custard, whipped cream, ladyfingers, custard, whipped cream) and constructing and serving it still inside its dish

    If you are planning to serve it the next day, the additional chilling time will let you make it in a springform pan with a "fence" of ladyfingers around the outside to hold it together; but you will need to stabilize the top layer of whipped cream so it holds it shape overnight.

  7. IN-DISH OPTION: If you are making a tiramisu that will stay inside its dish, whip all the heavy cream with the remaining vanilla extract until it is stiff.

  8. IN-DISH OPTION: Using a pastry brush, brush both sides of each ladyfinger with the espresso mixture and arrange them in a layer to cover the bottom of the ungreased dish. Then spread half the egg mixture over that, then half the whipped cream over that. Repeat with a second layer of ladyfingers, egg mixture, and whipped cream. (If you are sifting cocoa over the top, do that now.)

    Refrigerate tiramisu at least four hours before serving, to give the ladyfingers time to soften.

  9. SPRINGFORM PAN OPTION: If you are making a tiramisu that will stand on its own outside a pan, whip 2/3 of the whipped cream and the remaining vanilla until it is still.

  10. SPRINGFORM PAN OPTION: Using a pastry brush, brush both sides of each ladyfinger with the espresso mixture and arrange them in a layer to cover the bottom of the ungreased springform pan. (It's hard to make it come out even because it's round, but that's okay!) Then break about half of the remaining ladyfingers in half and arrange them upright around the inside of the pan, making a kind of picket fence.

  11. SPRINGFORM PAN OPTION: Spread half the egg mixture over the ladyfingers, then spread the stiff whipped cream over that. Then arrange the remaining ladyfingers over the whipped cream, and spread the remaining egg mixture over that.

  12. SPRINGFORM PAN OPTION: To stabilize the remaining whipped cream, sprinkle the gelatin powder over 2 tablespoons of water in a mug, and let it stand for 3 minutes. Then microwave it for five seconds, mix it, and microwave it again for five seconds. Repeat until the gelatin is dissolved and the mixture is smooth.

    Start whipping the remaining cream and vanilla/almond extract in an electric mixer on slow. Increase the speed to medium, and when it begins to get bubbly, slowly pour in the gelatin mixture. Then increase the speed to high until stiff peaks form. Using a star or flower nozzle, pipe the stabilized whipped cream onto the top of the tiramisu. If you are sifting cocoa over the tiramisu, do that now. Refrigerate up to 24 hours before serving.

  13. SPRINGFORM PAN OPTION: Carefully unclamp and remove pan side before serving.

    In this photo, I have added sugared raspberries and a light dusting of edible gold dust along with birthday candles.

What’s for supper? Vol. 384: One caprese summer (relics notwithstanding)

Happy Friday! I had a week that was just plain weird.

Let me tell you about it, and also what we ate. 

SATURDAY
Nachos

Saturday I was still in the grips of whatever it was that made food into my mortal enemy last week. I went grocery shopping verrrrry slowly and cautiously, and then came home and made nachos, but did not take a photo, because I can buy food and make food, and even eat a little bit of food, but apparently pointing a camera at it is a bridge too far. 

My nachos are not terribly inspiring anyway. I just cook and season some ground beef and sprinkle it over tortilla chips, throw some jalapeños over that, and cover it with shredded cheese, then heat it up, and serve it with sour cream and salsa. It’s one of those dishes I don’t really want to start making better, because then people will expect it, and I need to preserve some quick and brainless meal preps for myself.

In the afternoon, I rested for a bit and then to the flower farm up at the top of the hill, because the rabbits gobbled my beloved poppies up, and I was just feeling tragic about my garden and its stubs. It had been murderously hot and and humid for several days, but it suddenly turned cloudy and breezy, and flower son stood gazing at the horizon, and said, “. . . In about five minutes.” And then it started to sprinkle.

So I scurried around grabbing what I came for (perennial dianthus, tickweed, and some eggplants), but not fast enough. SUCH A DOWNPOUR. I briefly turned into Fielding Mellish

But I got my flars!

SUNDAY
Grab whatever

Sunday was a little rough. I ended up having to leave Mass early and go sit in the car because I was feeling so blehhhhh. Not too bleh to take a selfie because my hair was having a nice day, though. 

Clara and Damien went to a Bonny Light Horsemen concert, and a bunch of the other kids were doing this and that, so I couldn’t work up the enthusiasm to cook anything for the small group that was left. I may have had a bagel, but I truly don’t remember.

MONDAY
Steak and peach salad

Monday I was feeling quite a bit better, and agreed to take the kids to the library. Then on the way home, I remembered we needed duck food; and then the exit from the feed store is a weird traffic spot where it’s hard to turn left, so I decided to go right and take the long way home, and as long as we were on that road, I asked the kids if they wanted to hit the Salvation Army. 

And that is how I found the first class relics of Saint Peter, Apostle, and St. Helena, Empress. 

I am not kidding. They were in the jewelry case for $3 each and I was like, “oh, um, could I see those little round pieces, please?” and then I was like, “um, oh, I will take them, please.” I zipped them into my Vera Bradley wallet, because I didn’t know what else to do. And that is where they still are, actually. 

I didn’t have my reading glasses onat the store, so I couldn’t read the little labels until I got home. It just felt too insane to take in, and still does.

But I carefully unscrewed the backs

and saw this:

I talked to Sean Pilcher of Sacra Relics and sent some photos, and he said they are “doubtlessly authentic,” and that the wax seal inside is the seal of Giuseppe Nicolini, the bishop of Assisi who founded the Assisi Network that saved hundreds of Jews during World War II.

So. 

I have relics. Most likely.

I still have to pack them up and send them over to be cleaned and repaired, and I hope they can be documented. Pilcher said one of the major misconceptions about relics is that Catholics expect you to accept on blind faith that they are what we say they are; but actually it’s a pretty rigorous process of authentication that draws on expertise from several different fields. So we shall see!

In the mean time, it sure looks like our household picked up a couple of amazing new friends. I’m working on writing a long piece about it, and just trying to understand what it could possibly mean that I’m temporarily sharing a bedroom with some nearly 2000-year-old bone fragments of a man who was chosen by Jesus to be the rock on which the Church is built, and the woman who found the true cross. I’m open to ideas! I’m open to all kinds of things. 

My sister and her husband are making a reliquary for them, for as long as they will be in our house, and I’m waiting to hear back from my pastor about whether our parish wants and can accommodate them, and I talked further with Sean Pilcher and left some messages with Fr. Carlos Martins who hosts Treasures of the Church. My first goal is to have them as local as possible, with as much access for the faithful as possible.

I just. I don’t know. At first I was frightened and distressed, but now I am growing attached. 

Told you I was having a weird week! And yes, I did go back to the Salvation Army to see if there was . . . anything else. Which there was not, except for a silly nicknack from Target or something that looks exactly like a monstrance, except with a mirror in the middle. I talked to the manager about what I had found, and she said that, if someone drops off relics again, they will call a priest. (I was like, “So, for future reference, these are human remains. . . ” and she was like, “We can’t know everything!” and I was like “OH, I KNOW.”)

But! Relics none the less, I still needed to make supper. And this is still a food blog. So.

London broil was on sale, so I got four nice cuts. I seasoned them with salt and pepper, heated a skillet up screamingly hot and melted some butter on it, and then seared each steak for three or four minutes per side. 

Very nice. 

Some of it was a little underdone, even for us, so I threw those pieces back in the pan and finished them up while I cut up a bunch of peaches. So we had mixed greens, beef strips, peaches, crumbled goat cheese, and a sweet vinaigrette. 

Superb. I was feeling extremely depleted in general, so some lovely rare beef really hit the spot. 

TUESDAY
Corn dogs and chips

Tuesday I was feeling very much better, and RELICS NONETHELESS, I scurried around getting caught up on weeding and mulching and yard work. The grass was pretty high, and that is how I mowed right over an aerosol can of bug spray, which exploded with a bang and a cloud. No biggie, I have St. Peter and St. Helen in charge of the house now. I can run over whatever I want!

I’m just talking. I don’t know what is going on, for real. 

WEDNESDAY
Caprese pasta

Wednesday was our long-anticipated annual dumpstravaganza, relics howbeit. The kids cheerfully and willingly, just kidding, helped me drag a year’s worth of clutter and horrible crap from the yard into the driveway

and then I ruthlessly cleared off the porch, and four trips to the dump later, it looks like human beings live here.

You know you’re having a wonderful day when the dump guy asks if you’re okay. I was okay! I was just hot and exhausted and deep in “WE HAVE TO THROW EVERYTHING OUT AND WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH THESE PEOPLE AND WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH THIS HOUSE” mode. You’d think a dump guy would be familiar with that look, honestly. 

Got home and decided to tear down the vines that I had spent the last five or six years cultivating to grow over the porch to disguise its shabbiness. I had ordered Concord grape vines, which arrived as bare roots. I dutifully watered and fertilized and trained them, and was so excited that they finally started putting out fruit last year! And that is when I discovered that I may have ordered grape vines, but what they sent me were actually porcelain berry, which is poisonous and invasive. LE SIGH. So we’re starting over. 

Around 5:00, I saw to my dismay that I had scheduled myself to make a brand new recipe, which wasn’t ideal for how hot and pissed off I already was, but I didn’t want to waste the tomatoes and basil I had bought. So I made this caprese pasta from Sip and Feast.

Tiny little bit of prep work

but it came together very fast, and I thought it was delicious. 

Tasted exactly like what it was, of course (you can’t see it, but there are hunks of half-melted fresh mozzarella in there, and a good amount of red pepper flakes), which is a good thing. Lovely summer dish.

And now the last three times I made pasta, I did not overcook it! I can learn. 

THURSDAY
Pizza

On Thursday (relics regardlessly) I finally finally finally got back to working on the deck. In my old age, I have gained enough wisdom to realize that nobody who is feeling weak and shaky needs to be messing with a Sawzall, so I kept putting it off and putting it off.

But Thursday I was ready, and I got so much done. I took out the bad joist and put in a new joist with different hardware (and it fit, and *ahem* I rejoist) and cut and installed some floor planks, to close up the gap between the original structure and the new platform

Before:

and after:

Then I added a post on one corner and reinforced it with a sort of sheath of two long boards; and then I put a bottom sort of kickboard thingy (I don’t know what you call anything) and a top railing on. 

So today, all I need to do is buy some spindles or something, to fill in the railing, and then paint or stain it all, and it will be DONE.

I really wanted stairs for it, but that will be next year’s project. It has a ladder on one end and a climbing wall on the other, so it’s easy enough to get up and down. I know this, because I did it approximately 927 times yesterday, because I am constitutionally incapable of thinking about what tools I will need before I climb up a ladder.

I am so pleased with how it’s turning out.  I know it still looks very much like something that most people would be finally getting around to getting rid of; but it’s quite stable and strong, and the kids like hanging out of it. Once it’s had a little sanding and it’s all one color, I think it will look a lot more reputable. I have a vision, I tell you! And my secret is being too dumb to stop even when I realize I don’t know what I’m doing. 

Clara kindly made pizza for us. One pepperoni, one cheese, and one with leftover goat cheese, leftover basil, and red onion, which was fantastic. I forgot to eat all day, so believe me when I tell you. That was some good pizza. Relics notwithstanding. 

FRIDAY
Fish tacos

Just tortillas, frozen breaded fish, avocados, salsa, and sour cream. I just this moment realized this is supposed to have shredded cabbage on it, which I forgot to buy. Maybe I will chop up some collard greens, which are coming in nicely and desperately need thinning.

Oh, and fish tacos are supposed to have cilantro and limes. WELL, maybe I will go to the store. Maybe I’ll go to Aldi and find the Ark of the Covenant, who knows? 

Also, in relics notwithstanding news, I think I can say for certain that the weight loss I experienced when I was in full on NO FOOD NO HOW mode was not “just water weight.” I lost nine pounds when I was super sick, but I’ve been back to eating normal food for several days now, and, deliberately riding the wave of encouragement from having lost nine pounds, I lost another three pounds, meaning I’m back under The Terrible Number once again. 

My only regret is that I’m still revolted by even the idea of shrimp. Shrimp used to be my all-time favorite luxury treat, and now it feel like more of a threat. But you know, when I was about six, I had some Crackerjacks and then threw up out the window of my grandfather’s Toyota on the New Jersey Turnpike, and it was years and years before I could even think of Crackerjacks again. But now I can! Crackerjacks, crackerjacks. See? I’m fine. So I’m sure someday I’ll live to shrimp again. 

And that was my week! Headed to adoration in a bit, and I will ask St. Peter and St. Helena to watch over all of you, and make your collards grow or your power tools behave or your fat melt or your kids be helpful or whatever it is that you need. It’s on the house, especially if you’re too dumb to stop when you realize you don’t know what you’re doing. What a world.