There is no one for whom Adoration is a bad fit. Shy? You don’t have to even make eye contact with anyone. Love ritual and tradition? Bring a rosary or say the Liturgy of the Hours. Prefer to free-form it? Go for it. Not sure what your relationship with God is or is supposed to be? Just be there. Not in a state of grace? Be with the Lord so you can hear Him calling you home. Have a hard time sitting still? Make it a short visit. Like doing things in community with others? There is perpetual adoration going on all over the world all the time. Like private, individual worship? It’s just you and Him.
Prolife Spotlight #2: Rio Grande Valley Catholic Charities Humanitarian Respite Center
I was wondering which group to spotlight today, and this message fell into my lap from the family of Laura Tepen, a Facebook friend from Bloomington, Illinois:
The Tepen family is heading down to McAllen, Texas to volunteer at the border for a different kind of field trip. We will be working with Catholic Charities at the Humanitarian Respite Center for those families who are released from ICE detention, often sick and underfed. Our family has a call to help together in the small ways we can, and this cause has been weighing on our hearts. We now have the opportunity to show the corporal works of mercy to people in need, as a family.
As volunteers, we will be assisting with the everyday operations to serve up to 450 people who stay at the center every day. Please read the links below for more information on what the center does for people seeking asylum at our southern border. Our kids will be able to help with distributing items to those who need them, and they can play with the children staying there to be a welcoming and loving face of our country to them.
We will be collecting goods to take with us, as the center is in constant need of toiletries, clothing, medicines, etc. If you would like to donate, the following items are needed, and I can get them from you before we leave on February 21st:
The Humanitarian Catholic Charities of the Rio Grande Valley Humanitarian Respite Center needs the following items:
– Toiletries for men and women (deodorant, toothpaste, toothbrushes, combs, etc)
– Shoes (sandals, tennis shoes, loafers, etc) for men, women, children and infants of all sizes
– Clothes (pants, t-shirts, blouses, underclothing, etc) for children and adults of all sizes
– Baby supplies for toddlers (Pampers, baby wipes, baby bottles, etc.)
– Sealed snack food (granola bars, chips, peanut butter & cheese crackers, etc)
– Gift cards to purchase food items
– Phone cards
– Plastic bags for families to pack sandwiches, snacks, and water for their trip.
“The Humanitarian Respite Center, is a scant three blocks from the downtown McAllen bus station, where U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement releases refugees who have been cleared to stay in the country until their asylum claims are ruled on. Sister Norma has established a contingent of volunteers to take the immigrants to the center for a meal, a shower, a nap, a change of clothes, and to assist them in getting to their next location. “We’re just helping them to restore their dignity,” she says.”
Although we will be doing this trip on the CHEAP (we are staying in an RV for $33 per night and bringing all of our food), we are starting a GoFundMe in case anyone has it on their heart to contribute to our mission. If you choose to support our cause, please specify if you would like your money to provide items for the center or for our family’s travel expenses.

For more info:
“This Texas Charity Offers Border Crossers Warm Welcome to the United States”
“The Border Crisis Up Close: Local Volunteers Help at Migrant Respite Center in Texas”
***
Previous volumes of the Pro-life Spotlight:
If you know or have worked with an organization that works to build a culture that cherishes human life, please drop me a line at simchafisher at gmail dot com with “pro-life spotlight” in the title.
Special Valentine’s FREE Episode: 20 things we hated about FIREPROOF
We promised we’d have a podcast review of Kirk Cameron’s life-changing movie FIREPROOF for Valentine’s Day. And we lied! But we do have it just before midnight on the day after Valentine’s Day, and that’s, you know, fine. The good news is, we said twenty, but it’s actually twenty-seven.
This here is a special free podcast in honor of all men everywhere who struggle with trying to get their salt and pepper shakers separated when some asshole has glued them together.
Most weeks, our podcasts and archives are only available to patrons who pledge $1 or more through Patreon. These pledges keep this site going, and we appreciate them very much! How much? CONEY BONES MUCH!
I hope you enjoy it more than I enjoyed making this terrible graphic.

UPDATE: I should mention that it has been QUITE SOME TIME since we’ve managed to put out a podcast. We hope to start producing them again before too much longer, and we continue to be grateful to patrons for their support, but I feel the need to disclose what horrendous deadbeats we are at the moment.
How to spark joy with the stuff that no longer sparks joy
Kondo encourages you to shed the things that you can easily do without; but you’re not everyone. Maybe some poor person would love to have what you can’t wait to get rid of.
Or would they? If they don’t spark joy for you, does that mean they won’t spark joy for anyone? Do poor people who live off donations even really need joy, or what?
Read the rest of my latest for The Catholic Weekly.
Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash
St. Elizabeth the Unspecified, pray for us
One of my regrets (and man, I have a million) is that I’m not doing a great job introducing my kids to the saints. We have made a few stabs and this and that, but I’m not hugely devoted to any particular saint myself, so it just doesn’t come naturally.
We had a few saint biography collections when I was growing up, and I did read them repeatedly; but I think they ended up doing more harm than good, and I ended up with a bunch of ideas that were hard to shed. Namely: (a) saints were born that way (“before she even learned to talk, tiny Wiffletrude used to weep at her mother’s breast because it made her think of how Jesus thirsted on the cross.” That kind of thing) and (b) if I did become a saint, it was only a matter of time before the demonic attacks would begin, with bed shaking and foot clawing and stuff, and that did not sound great.
I also worried a lot about how poorly I would do when the Romans gave me one more chance to renounce Christ before cutting my skin off. I did figure that, if, because of my great beauty, I became unwilling but gentle queen of the land, I would definitely be the one who distributed bread to the peasants, like, 24/7.
I ended up with two patron saints: Unspecified Elizabeth and Michael the Archangel. And also a guardian angel. Do I remember that I have these holy ones watching over me? No, I do not. I’m just a lonely loner on a lonely road. Alone.
Terrible religious art also had a lot to answer for. Only very weird kids think, “Oh yeah, I can picture myself holding a palm branch with three fingers, with my eyeballs rolled up and a bunch of wispy roses framing my person at all times. Yep, that’s me. ” The state of religious art is definitely improving, and it’s also immensely helpful to learn about saints who are recent enough to appear in photos. Hagiographies have also gotten much better in recent years. Saints come across much more like actual, specific people, rather than goopy spirituality dolls.
Anyway, this gap in our family’s spirituality always comes into focus when one of my kids is preparing for confirmation. (In our area, they’re transitioning to restored order of sacraments, so confirmation happens when a kid is in his early teens.) They have to choose a confirmation patron saint and write a short essay. IS CATASTROPHE. I make some feeble suggestions which are met with floppiness. I point them toward some books which promptly slither into the couch crack. Wishing to appear hip and cyber, I suggest Jen Fulwiler’s Saint Name Generator; then I get distracted by Facebook and forget about the whole thing until the emails from the DRE get really insistent. And that’s what they mean when they say parents are a child’s primary educators.
However! They always end up choosing a bona fide saint with an actual biography attached to them, and no one has chosen a patron who clearly just got called up for the cool name. Not a St. Désirée or St. Gaspar de Bufalo or St. Lawdog in the bunch. Whether any of my kids have formed any kind of meaningful devotion to their patrons, I do not know.
But it occurs to me that, even if they never learned a single real fact about their saint, or said a single prayer to them, much less formed some kind of genuine spiritual friendship or devotion, the patron saint is still devoted to the confirmandi. And the same would be true even if some kid chose a saint purely to annoy their parents or solely so their new initials would spell out F.U.N.K or something. Right? You choose a patron, and they’re in, and that means they’re praying for you for the rest of your life, whether you think about it or not.
I don’t think it’s necessary to believe that you have been somehow spiritually nudged without your knowledge in the direction of the saint that’s just right for you. It’s possible, and I’ve heard plenty of stories where someone chooses something randomly, and it ends up being devastatingly relevant. But in either case, a spiritual friendship is a real thing, even if it comes about by chance and only goes one way; and a saint is, among other things, someone who’s always willing to try to bring someone closer to God.
That’s all I got. Like so many other things in Catholicism, it’s far less about our own efforts and merits than we realize, and it works out to be a pretty good deal for us. Salut! I mean, ora pro nobis.
Pro-life spotlight #1: China Little Flower
As I mentioned last week, I’ll be regularly featuring groups who do the work the president described in his SOTU speech: groups that “work together to build a culture that cherishes innocent life“and that “reaffirm a fundamental truth [that] — all children — born and unborn— are made in the holy image of God.”
One of my favorites for many years: China Little Flower. This charity started out with a couple who had met as exchange students in China. They started out simply helping a few orphaned babies, but soon realized there was a great need for a more organized effort. Because China’s culture and legal system is hostile toward children with disabilities, many families simply don’t have the money, the education, or the cultural support to raise a child with complex medical needs.
According to the BBC’s blog on disability:
The most widely used word for disability in Mandarin is canji, which literally means deficient/deformed and diseased. … [M]any traditional, pejorative terms for disabled people are still in common currency: canfei (crippled and useless), yaba(mute), shazi (idiot) and xiazi (a derogatory term for blind people) can still be heard on the lips of many ordinary citizens of the People’s Republic.
The Chinese government may have relaxed its strict one-child policy, but the culture is not now more welcoming of disabled children. Instead, state propaganda encourages parents to produce healthy children for the good of the country. Women and girls and those considered “useless” are still treated as less than human. According to Leta Hong Fincher in a NYT opinion piece, when China relaxed its brutal one-child policy,
the government was only embarking on another grand experiment in population engineering: This time it was urging women — though only the right sort — to reproduce for China.
[…]
The government has unleashed in recent years a propaganda blitz on women it considers to be gao suzhi, or of “high quality.” “Make sure you don’t miss out on women’s best years for getting pregnant!” warn some headlines in state media. Those years supposedly are between the ages of 24 and 29, according to the government; beyond that, it says, beware birth defects.
Parents who are willing to raise their disabled kids have little cultural or financial support, and little education on how to care for them.
This important clarification from Kelly Mayfield, author of Mine In China: Your comprehensive guide to adopting from China:
“In many cases these parents have made a heartbreaking decision because they can’t afford the medical care the child needs. You can see some images of parents leaving their children at the Guangzhou baby hatch at this link. You have to have cash up front for heart surgery, cancer treatment, etc. There is no legal way to relinquish children in China, so they abandon them in hopes that the child will receive the necessary care when they’re in an orphanage or if they are adopted by another family. Some of the children are left with notes that say ‘Please don’t let my child die. We are poor and can’t afford the surgery.'”
China Little Flower’s mission:
Recognizing the beauty and dignity of each and every individual person, China Little Flower works to build a culture of life by reaching out to those who are rejected, abandoned, deemed as useless, and who have no voice. Whether by direct care, support, or education, we seek to show the value of each human life and build a culture that respects, protects, loves and serves life!
They provide hospice care for orphans, group educational foster care, special care for infants, and long-term care for severely disabled children.
Dew Drops will provide both a long term, enriching home environment for abandoned children, and also a temporary home for families in need of support and specialized care, while they navigate the health care system. These families will benefit from financial, emotional and medical support in caring for their child during treatment, as well as ongoing support after they return home. Our primary focus is on children born with complex heart defects.
Our Orphan Care Unit will provide specialized medical care as well as foster healthy emotional development for abandoned children:
- Children ages 6 month to 5 years old born with complex congenital heart defects
• Capacity of 30 beds
• Every child will stay with us until (s)he is adopted
• Employ full time ‘moms’ who are trained in trauma-informed care practices and who will provide continuous, 24 hour care. This helps abandoned children learn to form attachments and heal from the past trauma they have experienced.In our Family Care Unit, in addition to specialized care, we also focus on educating families and advocating with them as they seek the best medical treatment for their child:
- Children from disadvantaged families (targeting rural areas) born with complex heart defects
• Capacity of up to 5 children/families at a time
• Children will be accompanied by at least one parent/family member during their stay
China Little Flower
4388 Steinbeck Way
Ave Maria, FL 34142
Sign up for their monthly newsletter and follow them on Facebook, where they share photos of some the beautiful babies in their care.
chinalittleflower.org
littleflowerprojects.org
dewdropslittleflower.org
If you know or have worked with an organization that works to build a culture that cherishes human life, please drop me a line at simchafisher at gmail dot com with “prolife spotlight” in the title.
I’m also looking for a name for this feature! Pro-life Spotlight is okay, but it could be better. Suggestions welcome.
What’s for supper? Vol. 160: Fleischschande and You
Hey, it’s still Friday! Here’s a food post!
SATURDAY
Caprese salami sandwiches
A simple favorite. Ciabatta rolls with Genoa salami, tomato, basil, and mozzarella, with olive oil and vinegar, salt and pepper. I couldn’t figure out why I didn’t have pictures, and then I remembered Damien and I went out! We went to Chili’s and spent a lot of the time talking about why it’s so much better than Applebee’s. It really is, but you wouldn’t understand.
SUNDAY
Hot wings, brats, Italian sausage, guacamole, chips, homemade hot pretzels, jalapeño cheese dip, and king cake
Of course that warr the Super Bowl. The best part of the night was when what’s his name took off his shirt and all my kids spontaneously booed and laughed at him.
The friendly and mellow Fr. Matt from Louisiana came by on the way to visit family, and he’d had two king cakes from Rouses delivered. He made the mistake of listing the possible fillings, so my inauthentic children chose apple, Bavarian cream, caramel, and chocolate. Nobody ate the babies!
Damien made the wings by frying them in oil, then rolling them around in a combination of bottled hot sauce (one bottle) and melted butter (one stick). You can add a squirt of Sriracha sauce if you can find the bottle, which you can’t because some lunatic has stuffed your fridge to the gills.
He also made a quick dipping sauce with sour cream and crumbled blue cheese, and we had celery just like in a fancy restaurant like Applebee’s or Chili’s or something.

I made this jalapeño popper dip, easy and yummy, but it turns out that I was correct in my concern that I was the only one who likes it. Diced jalapeños, sour cream, cream cheese, garlic, cheddar, and parmesan, all heated up with bread crumbs on top. Mmm.
For the beer brats, he poured about four pints of Narragansett beer and a few chopped onions, garlic powder, salt and pepper, and red pepper flakes into a bot, brought it to a boil, the simmered the brats in that for about fifteen minutes. Then he grilled them on the stovetop. Then he put them in the oven lest we all die of brats that have only been cooked two ways instead of three.
He also made a marinara sauce for the Italian sausage with some olive oil and chili pepper flakes, get that hot, throw in a diced onion and a bunch of diced garlic, and cook that up. Then throw in a can of tomato paste, stir, and add a can of tomatoes and about 6 ounces of red wine and a teaspoon of sugar. I read this paragraph over and have decided it’s in the diminished pluperfect mood, warmed over a hot past pretense.
I got it into my head to make homemade hot pretzels, which I adore. Even though my baking never, ever gets better, and guess what? This time I didn’t get any better. I used this Alton Brown recipe and ended up adding so, so, so SO so so much more flour than it said it would need, and then it was just a mess from then on. I’l spare you the details because I can’t remember them. Against all odds, a few of the pretzels turned out good:

But many more of the were pretty grisly looking.

They have a sort of Laocoön look to them, don’t they? A few of the kids liked them, but mostly they just hung around the house in a bag, getting flabbier and flabbier. The pretzels, I mean, ho ho ho ho ho ho ho.
MONDAY
Superleftovers
I mean really. Also Damien bought oysters which we forgot to eat, so we had those, and I also got frozen pirogies that I forgot to cook. Those are still in the freezer because I was experiencing fleischschande (meat shame) and couldn’t bear to make even more food.
It was also Monday that I took this picture in my car:

You know what, February is not my favorite month.
TUESDAY
Carnitas with rice and salsa verde
I took a big hunk of pork and put it in the slow cooker. Seized with ennui, I poured in a bunch of lime juice, sprinkled it with chili pepper flakes, and called it good. It cooked for eight hours, then I shredded it, spread it in a shallow pan, and sprinkled it with salt, pepper, garlic powder, chili powder, and cumin, and browned it up under the broiler.
I made salsa verde in my food processor.

My recipe called for 3/4 tsp of sugar, and that seemed like it couldn’t possibly be enough, so I used 3/4 cup. Allow me to state for the record that that is to much frickin sugar. Pbbbttt. I mean, I ate it, but still.
WEDNESDAY
Chicken burgers, fries, blueberries
Nothing to report.
THURSDAY
Meatball subs, salad
I make serviceable meatballs.

I cook them in the oven in a pan with drainage, then put them in a slow cooker with sauce, lest we die of meatballs cooked only one way.
FRIDAY
Quesadillas, guacamole and chips
I also make really good guacamole

and I only burned one quesadilla, and one of my kids likes them burnt! Ha!

Welp, here are some recipe cards. Onward and upward.

Slow cooker carnitas
Serve on tortillas with sour cream, guacamole, beans and rice, salsa, cilantro, or whatever you like.
Ingredients
- 1 pork shoulder
- 1 can beer (or soda)
- cumin
- chili powder
- salt and pepper
Instructions
-
Put pork shoulder in slow cooker with beer. Cook on low for five hours or more, until pork falls apart when poked.
-
Preheat broiler.
-
Shred meat, mix together with spices, and spread in a thin layer on a shallow pan. Broil for a few minutes until meat is slightly crisped.
-
Serve on tortillas with whatever additions you like.

Salsa verde
Ingredients
- 10-12 tomatillos
- 3 jalapeno peppers
- 10 cloves garlic with wrappers on
- 1-2 medium onions, peeled and quartered
- 3/4 tsp sugar
- 3/4 cup chicken broth
- 1/4 cup lime juice
- 1 bunch cilantro
- olive oil for cooking
Instructions
-
Preheat the broiler.
-
Put unwrapped tomatillos, whole jalapenos, garlic cloves with wrappers on, and peeled, quartered onions in a shallow pan, and broil until slightly blackened - about 5 minutes.
-
Let the vegetables cool. Pull the wrappers off the garlic, cut the tops off the jalapenos (but leave the seeds and insides), and trim the ends off the onions.
-
Put all vegetables inside a food processor, and add a big handful of cilantro and 3/4 tsp sugar. Blend until it's pulpy. It will be runny.
-
Heat a little olive oil in a saute pan and add the vegetable mixture. Heat, stirring, until it thickens up a bit.
-
Add 3/4 cup chicken broth and 1/4 cup lime juice and continue heating, stirring from time to time, until it thickens up again.

Meatballs
Make about 100 golf ball-sized meatballs.
Ingredients
- 3 lbs ground meat (I like to use mostly beef with some ground chicken or turkey or pork)
- 4 eggs, beaten
- 2 cups panko bread crumbs
- 4 oz grated parmesan cheese (about 1 cup)
- 1/4 cup Worcestershire sauce
- salt, pepper, garlic powder, oregano, basil, etc.
Instructions
-
Preheat oven to 400.
-
Mix all ingredients together with your hands until it's fully blended.
-
Form meatballs and put them in a single layer on a pan with drainage. Cook, uncovered, for 30 minutes or more until they're cooked all the way through.
-
Add meatballs to sauce and keep warm until you're ready to serve.

White Lady From NH's Guacamole
Ingredients
- 4 avocados
- 1 medium tomato, diced
- 1 medium jalapeno, minced
- 1/2 cup cilantro, chopped roughly
- 1 Tbsp minced garlic
- 2 limes juiced
- 1 tsp chili powder
- salt and pepper
- 1/2 red onion, diced
Instructions
-
Peel avocados. Mash two and dice two.
-
Mix together with rest of ingredients and add seasonings.
-
Cover tightly, as it becomes discolored quickly.
Must be nice!
There’s not some finite bin of pleasure in the world, and there’s no reason to feel guilty for enjoying whatever measure of it comes our way for as long as it lasts. On the contrary, when I’m happy, I’m much more apt to be generous and patient; and one cheerful person can lift the mood of an entire household. And even if my happiness didn’t do anyone else any good: I matter, too! It’s a good thing to be happy. Why wouldn’t it be?
Protected: Podcast #66: Don’t bend over!
I’m done letting anger separate me from pro-life work.
I made a mistake.
When I realized the GOP was going to nominate and elect Trump, I became so disgusted by that conspiracy of gullibility and corruption, I allowed myself to become distanced from pro-life work.
I still donated to pro-life organizations; I still prayed every night for the protection of unborn babies; and I still agonized over my moral responsibility at each and every election. But, while I still challenged readers not to accept the horror of abortion, I wrote less frequently about explicitly pro-life causes. Because of my anger, I stopped engaging with and promoting explicitly pro-life work.
I’m still angry, and justifiably so. I’m angry that there is abortion in the world. I’m angry that it feels necessary to so many people. I’m angry that born and unborn babies, pregnant mothers, and all women aren’t cherished and protected. There is no bond like the bond between mother and child, and it tears me apart when they are dehumanized and brutalized by anyone. Sometimes I’m so angry, I can hardly breathe.
But that was my mistake. Moloch doesn’t care who you’re angry at, as long as your anger keeps you from fighting for innocent lives. So I’m taking a breath. If you’re as angry as I am, I’m inviting you to take a fresh start with me, and see what good we can do.
Last night, at the State of the Union speech, President Trump said some good words:
Let us work together to build a culture that cherishes innocent life.
And let us reaffirm a fundamental truth — all children — born and unborn— are made in the holy image of God.
His speechwriter is absolutely correct. This is what we must work for.
How? For a quick and easy way to push back against laws that would allow for late-term abortions and infanticide, you can use this form to urge your senators to co-sponsor and vote for the Born-Alive Abortion Survivors Protection Act. This is a good and possibly even a useful thing to do, and I’ll do it today. But it’s not enough, especially when I know the pro-life politicians are only pro-some-lives. Voting for them feels like planting a victory flag in quicksand.
Not everyone feels this way. If you think the Trump presidency has been good for the pro-life movement and has made the world better and safer for babies and their mothers, this post isn’t for you. I know I won’t change your mind, and I’m no longer trying to. I can’t seem talk about it without getting angry and losing focus. So right now, I just want to write about groups doing genuine pro-life work.
One such organization is Immigrant Families Together.
Who do they help? They help innocent life made in the holy image of God. One example (a real person, whose name is protected for her privacy):
A seventeen-year-old girl in Guatemala who was sold to a gang leader. He raped her and got her pregnant, then beat her so badly, the baby died. Then she got pregnant again.
This time, she decided to get out. So she began to walk, with her innocent unborn child inside of her. She crossed a thousand miles to present herself and her unborn baby at a legal port of entry at the U.S. She broke no laws; she followed the protocol. She just wanted to live, and she wanted her baby to live.
But you know what happens when people present themselves at our borders. They are not cherished. They are not treated as if they are made in the holy image of God. They are caught up in our political wrangling, and they suffer, and their children suffer.
Families are still being separated as a matter of course; children are being thrust into foster care and lost track of permanently. Pregnant mothers are miscarrying while they languish in custody. Mothers who wanted life for their children are having their children taken away. They have not done anything immoral by looking for help. They simply want to live, and they want their children to live. Helping them find each other again and live together in peace is pro-life work.
Immigrant Families Together goes right to the people caught in that tangle and helps them in immediate, tangible ways. They are currently helping that Guatemalan woman through her complex legal process so she doesn’t lose another child.
The first woman they helped was Yeni Gonzalez Garcia, whose story is here. Through the work of IFT, Gonzalez-Garcia has been reunited with her children.
Here is a summary of their work:
- Raising of bond funds through coordinated crowdfunding and individual giving in order to post bond for parents separated from their children at the US/Mexico Border.
- Paying bonds and providing pro bono legal representation to fulfill all legal responsibilities while awaiting trial so that they may be with their children.
- Arranging safe transportation from state of detention to the city where children are currently in foster care.
- When needed, finding longterm housing in the destination city while they await trial.
- Connecting parents in cities with resources in order to sustain them during the process of being unified with their children.
- Working with local organizations and government to expedite the process of achieving full custody of their children while they await trial.
- We have expanded our services to also include a legal referral services, AYUDAS and have rapid response response teams to assist recently released detainees and families.
You can donate through their site, or find a Facebook page that’s more local, such as Immigrant Families Together Midwest, Immigrant Families Together – California, Immigrant Families Together East Coast, Immigrant Families Together South.
I would like to routinely highlight the work of organizations doing pro-life work like this. If you work with or know of a group doing this kind of work, drop me a line at simchafisher at gmail dot com.
Anger is only good when it propels you to do good works. Let’s take a breath and start again.
