Jesus knew about Uncle Ted

There is a permanent lump in my throat as I read the news about our Church, about who knew what, and who decided nothing should be done.

I read the news, and I don’t know what to do. I can’t see my way to withholding our paltry weekly contribution to the parishes we attend. Our money helps support the diocese, and also the soup kitchen, and the little parish school with paper flowers in the windows. Heating fuel in the winter, some modest vestments for Father. The AIDS outreach ministry. The salaries of kind, hardworking christians. And the diocese. I work for the diocese myself. Is our diocese rotten too? I have no idea. I’m told it’s naive to believe anyone and anything isn’t rotten in the Church anymore.

Last Sunday, I watched my son carry the heavy, brass cross up the center aisle. He loves being an altar boy, is downcast on the weeks when he’s not called to serve.  I’d been allowing myself to daydream of the moment when he might tell me he wants to be a priest. And now I must also think of the moment I’ll tell him how to protect himself in seminary, how to ward off attack from the depraved, how to keep himself innocent as he learns how to bring Christ into the world.

I don’t know what to do. Write to the bishop, I suppose. Demand more oversight by laypeople. Demand that they stop lobbying against extensions of the statute of limitations. Demand more transparency. I will do some penance. I will pray. I will listen to people who rage against the Church, and I will offer no defense, because all of it is true.

The answer I keep coming to: Jesus already knew. He carried the sin of Cardinal McCarrick in his butchered heart. He groaned the groan of a tortured seminarian as His back was laid open. His scalp split with the pressure of the thorny mass of lies, evasions, excuses, and accommodations as the decades passed and everybody knew, everybody knew what went on, everybody knew about Uncle Ted. And Christ knew about Uncle Ted. And He wept, and bled, and died, knowing.

You think you want to run away from the Church. You think you will find a place where there is not so much hypocrisy, so much entrenched evil, a place that isn’t built from layer upon layer of guilt and shame and depravity. You may find such a place, I don’t know. But you will not find in it a God who weeps and bleeds and dies, who has taken sin into His bosom, swallowed it whole, let it burn in His belly until it finally burns out. You will only find this God in the Holy Roman Rotten Catholic Church, where the depraved teach young men how to confect God.

It is a rotten church. But it is not rotten to the heart, because Jesus is the heart. There is more bloodshed there than I expected to see.  But Jesus is there. He knew about Uncle Ted, and He knew about everything else we’re about to find out. That is why He came. Remember this, whatever else we do.

 

Image: Jesus with Crown of Thorns by Follower of Aelbrecht Bouts [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

Contest winners + I’m on The Catholic Podcast with Joe Heschmeyer

Sorry for the delay in the list of winners! Everyone on this list has been notified using the email they provided to enter the contest.

Monday
Christine Dumouchel
Julie Von Rotz

Tuesday
Victoria Treboschi
Theresa Hardy

Wednesday
Lori Magelky
Stacia Demeulenaere

Thursday
Jamie Piper
Jake Casey
Jessica Marsh

Friday
Rachel Nesbitt
Debbie McGeehan
Catherine Burnham

If you entered and see your name here and haven’t seen an email from me, please check your junk folder, or make sure that you didn’t provide an obsolete email to Rafflecopter. (If you entered using Facebook, Rafflecopter showed me the email address that is associated with Facebook.)

Congratulations! And thank you so much, one more time, to all the generous sponsors. You are wonderful.

Next order of business: I had a wonderful (well, that’s how I remember it) conversation about NFP, Humanae Vitae, chastity, and Jell-o with Joe Heschmeyer of The Catholic Podcast (unfortunately Chloe Langr, the regular co-host, couldn’t be there). You can hear the podcast here, and check out tons of other resources we mentioned in the conversation.

 

What was for supper last week? Vol. 137: Ah’m a-splurgin’!

It was vacation week! We ate like kings!

SATURDAY
Steak and lobster

We had a lot of kid activities planned, so Damien wanted to make sure we had one fine grown-up meal. (The kids had hot dogs and chips at home.) He packed up a cooler and we went here:

We swam for a while, with nobody else in the entire pond except for some loons and a bunch of amorous dragonflies. Then he made a fire and we had bread and cheese, strawberries and blackberries while the flames died down.

He put some steaks and lobsters over the coals:

The lobster only needed a few minutes on each side, and we ate it with herbed butter and lemons while the steaks finished cooking. I’ve never had grilled lobster before. The sweet flesh with a smoky edge is completely wonderful. The steak had a simple rub of salt, pepper, garlic powder, and came out insanely tender with lots of juice.

 

Also, having visible cooking marks on the lobster really helps me get over that last psychological “you are cracking apart and devouring an entire creature here, you psychopath” obstacle. It just looks more like food. Score another point for charring your food! I’ll take my charred lobster cancer like a man.

We also brought some peaches to grill (most desserts are out for me because they are migraine triggers), but we were both stuffed to the gills and couldn’t eat any more.

And that is how you kick off vacation week!

SUNDAY
Buffalo chicken salad, fries, cherries

One of my kids has a job in a deli, and she’d been hungrily eyeing their buffalo chicken salad. I couldn’t find an exact recipe, but since she had never actually tasted it, I didn’t think I could really get it wrong.

I cooked a few pounds of pasta (I believe it was radiatori. Here is a nice guide to pasta shapes), then I took 3 large chicken breasts and put them in the Instant Pot with a cup of water, high pressure for 7 minutes. I cut the cooked chicken into chunks and mixed it together with the pasta and:

4 stalks celery diced
3/4 cup sour cream
10 oz blue cheese dressing
1/2 cup buffalo sauce
2 Tbs paprika
It was pretty good. Not knock-your-socks-off, but if you like buffalo sauce, it’s something a little different, and it sure was easy to make. It’s supposed to have carrots, but I don’t think that would have added much (but you definitely want the celery in there, for texture and to cool your tongue from the hot sauce). I also made plain pasta, which is what most of the kids ate, which is why there was enough left over for me to eat lunch all week.
I hadn’t really planned out any sides. I have a hard time coming up with sides to pasta salads. It’s like when my grandmother went to the pet store asking for food for her daughter’s Sea Monkeys, and the man said, “Lady, Sea Monkeys are food.” So I ended up with a kind of self-inflicted one-family potluck meal of buffalo chicken salad, french fries, and cherries. Well, they ate it!
MONDAY
Chicken caprese sandwiches

Now this was a good idea. I had more chicken breasts (I guess they must have been on sale), so I roasted them under the broiler with salt and pepper, then sliced them. Then we laid out chicken, sliced mozzarella, sliced tomatoes, fresh basil, prosciutto, olive oil, balsamic vinegar, salt and pepper, and let people build their own sandwiches.

I also put out some mayonnaise and pesto sauce, but I didn’t end up using it. This was an extremely tasty summer sandwich, very fresh and pleasant and filling. I should have used Italian bread instead of Kaiser rolls, was the only thing. Next time!

TUESDAY
Ocean!

Tuesday was ocean day. New Hampshire really only has one beach, about two hours from us, and it’s terribly trashy at night, but gorgeous during the day. We brought along subs, nectarines, chips, and cookies from the supermarket for lunch, and managed to eat most of it before the very bold seagulls had their way with it. I love the ocean.

It was a completely wonderful day. We didn’t bring any shovels or buckets or kites or floaties or anything. Just played in the cold waves and the fresh breeze and the glittering sun for hours and hours. Irene got lost and we, um, forgot to bring Lucy’s insulin. But the lifeguards found Irene again and Damien squeezed some insulin out of a local pharmacy and it was still fun. I love the ocean.

For dinner, I had my heart set on eating somewhere that served food in plastic baskets and had sand in the bathroom, so that’s what we did. It was called Swampy’s Sea Shack or Chunko’s Squid Hut or something along those lines. There were a bunch of drunken louts singing “Sweet Caroline” over their beers. I had the calamari platter. The coleslaw was terrible. I love the ocean.

WEDNESDAY
Deconstructed shish kabob; pineapple cucumber salad; Tweezlaires

I took a big hunk of pork and cut it into big cubes and mixed it up with wedges of red onion and green pepper. I had mushrooms, too, but they had gotten all slimy, alas. I stirred it up with a marinade of lemon juice, olive oil, salt, pepper, oregano, garlic powder, and red pepper flakes and let it sit for a few hours.

We briefly considered putting the food on skewers and grilling it outside, but we were still exhaustipated from the beach, so I just spread the meat and veggies in a shallow pan and put it under the broiler until it was a little blackened. Good stuff.

Again I needed a side dish, but hadn’t made solid plans. My friend Jennifer suggested this pineapple cucumber salad, which calls for pineapple and cucumber, which I had, and lime zest and fresh cilantro, which I didn’t. So I used bottled lime juice and chili lime seasoning. It was nice! Just something different. May try again when I have cilantro.

We also had Tweezlaires, because that’s what I told the kids we were having before I found the pineapple recipe.

THURSDAY
Bibimbap

Oh son. If you haven’t made bibimbap, then this is your time. It is absolutely the party that your mouth deserves to have.

I sliced up some pork as thin as I could and set it to marinate in gochujang sauce, which I made with gochujang, honey, sugar, garlic, and soy sauce (proportions here).

I also sliced up a bunch of carrots and cucumbers very thin with the wide end of a cheese grater, because someone has absconded with the spindle part of my food processor. I set them to pickle in water with some white vinegar and sugar mixed in.

I made a ton of rice in the Instant Pot. It comes out good and sticky when you use the 1:1 method. When the rice was almost done, I fried up the meat in a skillet, and sliced and sauteed some mushrooms.

Then, when the rice was done, everyone put some in a bowl, and piled on their choice of pork, pickled vegetables, pea sprouts, and mushrooms, with sesame seeds, soy sauce, and wasabi sauce. And then a fricken fried egg on top. It’s so good. The various juices trickle down through the rice and you just have to focus on not passing out with joy before you get to the bottom.

FRIDAY
Canobie Lake Park!

Friday was our long-awaited trip to the excellent amusement park that’s a couple of hours away. We went with the Girl Scouts, who picked up a big part of the tab, so we splurged on actual park food for lunch, and then we had monstrous ice cream sundaes around dinner time.

We stayed eleven hours. Would have been longer, but there came a crashing, thundering downpour and they had to close the park and evacuate everyone. We made our way to Papa Ginos. I don’t care what you say, it’s really quite good pizza. Also, we only ever seem to eat there when we are wet, exhausted, and completely starving. But I still think it’s good pizza!

And that’s what we did on our summer vacation.

Friday: 3 monitors, 2 boxes of test strips, and a Marquette class!

It’s the final countdown! Or whatever. Today is the last day of my week of raffles. My lovely sponsors have donated no fewer than eight fertility monitors so far. Amazing! Pee on them in good health, my friends!

Today, there are three final prizes:

One monitor, donated by my friend Beth Brenner Wallace (prize for US winner)

One monitor and box of test strips, donated by Smart Loving (prize for winner in any country)

One monitor, box of test strips, and online introductory class with optional breastfeeding instruction and one year of follow-up, donated and taught by Lauren Vitale (prize for US winner)!

A little bit about Smart Loving:

SmartLoving has a range of programs for marriage enrichment and marriage preparation that aim to integrate Theology of the Body insights and modern psychology to give couples practical tools and spiritual nourishment to live the Catholic vision for marriage. We are currently investing in taking our programs into online learning to give affordable access to Couples all over the world to quality marriage enrichment and preparation.

Part of this mission is includes introducing couples to the actual Catholic teaching and vision for a couple’s fertility and promoting Fertility Awareness Methods of all kinds as an alternative to the ‘standard fare’.

See SmartLoving for more information!

***

A bit about Lauren Vitale:

Lauren Vitale, who worked for many years as a pediatric nurse, says:

I first learned about the Marquette Method after my youngest child was born. Natural Family Planning while breastfeeding has specific challenges, and I found the objectivity of the Marquette Method gave me greater confidence. I was so encouraged that it motivated me to become an instructor in the Marquette Method and put my nursing knowledge to good use: helping women and couples know their fertility and be empowered to make decisions with confidence.

I have been teaching the Marquette Method since May of 2017 after being trained as an instructor through the Marquette University School of Nursing Institute for Natural Family Planning. I received my full certification in May of 2018 after completing the continued practicum through Marquette University. My training has given me the opportunity to truly appreciate the value of a research-based and scientific approach to Natural Family Planning by working with the researchers and developers of the Marquette Method. I have loved meeting so many amazing women and couples from all over the world, and I enjoy helping them learn and apply the Marquette Method to meet their family planning goals.

Read more about the Marquette method and Lauren’s practice here.

***

How do I enter? Use the Rafflecopter form below. Please be sure to use the right one for your country. It gives you several ways to enter. If the form doesn’t show up, click on the link that says “a Rafflecopter giveaway” at the bottom of the post. Only one prize per household.

How often can I enter? You may enter once per day, using as many ways of entering as you like (see form below for details). Two winners will be chosen M-W, three on Thursday and three on Friday. Each day is a separate raffle. Each raffle runs from midnight to midnight, eastern time.

Can I win if I live outside the US? Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday are open only to US residents. On Thursday, there will be one prize for a US resident and two for UK residents; and on Friday, there will be two prizes for a US resident and one for a resident of any country. Please be sure only to enter the raffle for your country!

When will winners be announced? I’ll choose winners for each raffle every day on Monday through Friday. I’ll announce all the winners on Friday, or possibly on Saturday if I am a terrible person.
If you are a winner, I will notify you using the address you provided to Rafflecopter.

Do I have to provide my actual email address, even though I worry that you will use it to steal my soul and then go on a shopping spree at Forever 21? Yes, please use an actual email address. I don’t even want your soul. Your valid email is the only way I have of getting in touch with you if you win, so please make sure that when you sign up for Rafflecopter, you use an active address! If I can’t get in touch with you, I’ll pick a different winner.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

a Rafflecopter giveaway

a Rafflecopter giveaway

It’s a great loss when we train ourselves to stop receiving beauty

I can learn to decipher what their calls might mean, but it would be a great loss, a bizarre and ungrateful act, to deliberately train myself to stop hearing their music as music.

Read the rest of my latest for The Catholic Weekly.

Thurbsday giveaway: 2 UK prizes, one US prize

Day four of the Clearblue monitor giveaway, and it’s finally UK day! Also US day still! Also, several people have asked about Canada, and I’m happy to announce that, tomorrow, I’ll have a prize open to a resident of any country.

I want to make sure it’s clear: You can enter each day’s raffle, as long as it’s for your country. If you aren’t notified that you’ve won, feel free to keep trying the next day.

As a final note: I am aware that the graphic says “day 1.” I made it last night and I was tired and do not know what is going on. Just roll with it.

Today, we have two monitors, each with a box of test strips, to give away for UK residents, and one monitor for a US resident. There are two separate raffles. Please be sure to enter the right one for your country. 

Gina Terrana has donated the monitor for a US winner, and hopes the Marquette method will help couples who want to conceive. The UK donor would like to remain anonymous. Thank you to both donors!

The raffle details:

How do I enter? Use the Rafflecopter form below. Please be sure to use the right one for your country. It gives you several ways to enter. If the form doesn’t show up, click on the link that says “a Rafflecopter giveaway” at the bottom of the post. Only one prize per household.

How often can I enter? You may enter once per day, using as many ways of entering as you like (see form below for details). Two winners will be chosen per day. Each day is a separate raffle. Each raffle runs from midnight to midnight, eastern time.

Can I win if I live outside the US? Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday are open only to US residents. On Thursday, there will be one prize for a US resident and two for UK residents; and on Friday, there will be two prizes for a US resident and one for a resident of any country.

When will winners be announced? I’ll choose two winners each day on Monday through Friday. I’ll announce all the winners on Friday, or possibly on Saturday if I am a terrible person.
If you are a winner, I will notify you using the address you provided to Rafflecopter.

Do I have to provide my actual email address, even though I worry that you will use it to steal my soul and then go on a shopping spree at Forever 21? Yes, please use an actual email address. I don’t even want your soul. Your valid email is the only way I have of getting in touch with you if you win, so please make sure that when you sign up for Rafflecopter, you use an active address! If I can’t get in touch with you, I’ll pick a different winner.

Good luck!

If the Rafflecopter forms don’t show up below, please use this link for the UK raffle

and use this link for the US raffle.

.

 

a Rafflecopter giveaway

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Wednesday giveaway: Monitors #5 and #6

Day three of the Clearblue monitor giveaway! Winners of yesterdays monitors and boxes of test strips will be notified by email very shortly.

Today, we have two monitors to give away. The first is sponsored by Laura and Keith Phillips. Thank you very much!

The second is sponsored by Frances Jue, who has written a short introduction to Endow, for which she facilitates a chapter.

 

Frances says:

The feminine genius.

Five years ago this phrase was unknown to me. Five years ago, I was cradling a newborn baby girl in my arms, delighting in all of her charms. There’s just something special when a woman has a little girl. We know what to expect, in a certain sense, as she makes her way from girlhood to womanhood.

 

We know the joys and potential crosses that lay before her. As I gazed on her perfect, innocent face, my own clouded with vague worries that finally formed themselves into a clear question – what does it mean to be a woman? Having been raised in a Christian home, I was equipped with enough information to reject the world’s presentation of femininity. I knew there was more to me than physical attraction, maintaining sex appeal, attaining power, or proving myself to be just as good as the men. I knew I was lovingly made by my Creator, and that He had dreams and plans for me. But that knowledge didn’t concretely tell me what being a woman truly meant. What did authentic femininity look like, and, what most pressed on my heart, how could I pass that on to my daughter?

 

Several years later I was in a local Catholic bookstore. Since my conversion to the Catholic Church in 2007 I had become increasingly familiar with the brilliance of John Paul II. I was curious about this phrase I kept running across – the feminine genius – and decided to get a copy the encyclical Mulieris Dignitatem, where this term had originated. As I made my purchase that day, the lovely lady that rang me up spoke enthusiastically of the encyclical and asked if I had ever heard of a ministry called Endow. She explained that their name was an acronym for Educating on the Nature and Dignity of Women, and that they provided studies that focused on the feminine genius. Her enthusiasm for the document and the ministry culminated her saying “you should start a chapter in your parish”.

With absolutely no intention of doing so, I smiled, said “sure” and walked out the door. Mulieris Dignitatem was life changing for me. In it, John Paul II elaborates on the unique attributes that are essential to all women – just as there are physical characteristics that all women possess that make them female, so too our nature (the reality by which we are what we are (Frank Sheed, Theology and Sanity) has definitive markings. Our vocation steers us toward who we are called to serve in love. Our masculinity or femininity points us toward how we are called to love. A woman’s feminine genius expresses itself in a unique capacity to both physically and spiritually nurture new life, in her natural inclination to personalize, empathize, and to enter into the sufferings of another. A woman’s body expresses what she intuits in her heart – that she is made to love and be loved, truly imaging that “man only finds himself through a gift of self”.

 

Five years ago I had so many questions. God heard my mother’s heart, so aching to give my little girl truth and goodness, and He answered with excessive generosity. This understanding of myself as a woman breathed new life into me. Far deeper and richer than mere superficial trappings this helped me understand who I am at my core, and how I am called to image Christ to the world around me. This was the beautiful truth of what it meant to be created female, in the image and likeness of God.

 

Endow has done an amazing job of presenting the Church’s treasure trove of wisdom for all women. I’ve been facilitating studies for two years now, and I really can’t overstate the impact these study groups have had on me and the women in my church. Drawing from the writings of John Paul II, Edith Stein, Catherine of Siena, Thomas Aquinas (and more!) each study presents women with fresh, beautiful insights on their feminine genius. This really is the heart of the new evangelization. Authentic beauty is never a mere product for consumption, but invites us to respond – as women, it is in our power to invite the world to respond to God’s love through the beauty of our feminine genius.

 

If you’d like to (and trust me, you do!) learn more about Endow, you can go to their website:

 

From the bottom of my heart, thank you to all the women at Endow, who responded to God’s call to nurture the hearts and souls of your sisters in Christ, so hungry for the beauty and goodness of truth.

 ***

Thank you to both donors!

Today’s raffle is open only to US residents. Tomorrow, there will be one monitor and box of test strips for US residents and two monitors and two boxes of test strips for UK residents.

The raffle details:

How do I enter? Use the Rafflecopter form below. It gives you several ways to enter. If the form doesn’t show up, click on the link that says “a Rafflecopter giveaway” at the bottom of the post. Only one prize per household.

How often can I enter? You may enter once per day, using as many ways of entering as you like (see form below for details). Two winners will be chosen per day. Each day is a separate raffle. Each raffle runs from midnight to midnight, eastern time.

Can I win if I live outside the US? Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday are open only to US residents. On Thursday, there will be one prize for a US resident and one for a UK resident; and on Friday, there will be one prize for a US resident and one for an Australia resident.

When will winners be announced? I’ll choose two winners each day on Monday through Friday. I’ll announce all the winners on Friday, or possibly on Saturday if I am a terrible person.
If you are a winner, I will notify you using the address you provided to Rafflecopter.

Do I have to provide my actual email address, even though I worry that you will use it to steal my soul and then go on a shopping spree at Forever 21? Yes, please use an actual email address. I don’t even want your soul. Your valid email is the only way I have of getting in touch with you if you win, so please make sure that when you sign up for Rafflecopter, you use an active address! If I can’t get in touch with you, I’ll pick a different winner.

Good luck!

If the Rafflecopter form doesn’t show up below, follow this link.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Tuesday Clearblue Fertility Monitor Giveaway #3 and #4

Day two of the Clearblue monitor giveaway! Winners of yesterdays monitors and boxes of test strips will be notified by email very shortly.

Today, we have two sponsors. An anonymous donor who uses and likes Marquette is sponsoring a monitor, and Kathy Aabram is sponsoring a monitor and box of test strips. Kathy requests prayers for a mom, A., in a difficult and unstable situation, for her baby, and for the potential adoptive couple she’s working with.

Thank you to both donors!

I hope you enjoy today’s graphic. I put a lot into it, as always.

Today’s raffle is open only to US residents. There will be one prize for UK residents and one for Australia residents in the coming days.

The raffle details:

How do I enter? Use the Rafflecopter form below. It gives you several ways to enter. If the form doesn’t show up, click on the link that says “a Rafflecopter giveaway” at the bottom of the post. Only one prize per household.

How often can I enter? You may enter once per day, using as many ways of entering as you like (see form below for details). Two winners will be chosen per day. Each day is a separate raffle. Each raffle runs from midnight to midnight, eastern time.

Can I win if I live outside the US? Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday are open only to US residents. On Thursday, there will be one prize for a US resident and one for a UK resident; and on Friday, there will be one prize for a US resident and one for an Australia resident.

When will winners be announced? I’ll choose two winners each day on Monday through Friday. I’ll announce all the winners on Friday, or possibly on Saturday if I am a terrible person.
If you are a winner, I will notify you using the address you provided to Rafflecopter.

Do I have to provide my actual email address, even though I worry that you will use it to steal my soul and then go on a shopping spree at Forever 21? Yes, please use an actual email address. I don’t even want your soul. Your valid email is the only way I have of getting in touch with you if you win, so please make sure that when you sign up for Rafflecopter, you use an active address! If I can’t get in touch with you, I’ll pick a different winner.

Good luck!

If the Rafflecopter form doesn’t show up below, follow this link.

 

a Rafflecopter giveaway

NFP Awareness Week: Clearblue Fertility Monitor Giveaway #1 and #2

Here we are again! NFP Awareness Week. Here’s the deal: We love the Marquette method of NFP. It’s made NFP so much easier and has given us so much more confidence. And, like, Corrie is almost three-and-a-half and she is still the youngest, so.

But the monitor costs more than $100, and you have to buy a box of test strips every few months, too. For many years, we just couldn’t afford it, and I know plenty of people are in the same boat.

Happily, I have many generous friends, and ten of them have offered to sponsor a total of eleven monitors to give away, plus several boxes of test strips, plus instruction with one or possibly two instructors!

 

Today, we have two sponsors, each sponsoring a monitor and box of test strips to give away. One is my friend Tanya Cleary, and the other is an anonymous donor. Thanks so very much to them!

For my part, I will try to post a new, terrible graphic each day this week. It’s not easy, but I’m willing.

Today’s raffle is open only to US residents. There will be one prize for UK residents and one for Australia residents in the coming days.

The raffle details:

How do I enter? Use the Rafflecopter form below. It gives you several ways to enter. If the form doesn’t show up, click on the link that says “a Rafflecopter giveaway” at the bottom of the post. Only one prize per household.

How often can I enter? You may enter once per day, using as many ways of entering as you like (see form below for details). Two winners will be chosen per day. Each day is a separate raffle. Each raffle runs from midnight to midnight, eastern time.

Can I win if I live outside the US? Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday are open only to US residents. On Thursday, there will be one prize for a US resident and one for a UK resident; and on Friday, there will be one prize for a US resident and one for an Australia resident.

When will winners be announced? I’ll choose two winners each day on Monday through Friday. I’ll announce all the winners on Friday, or possibly on Saturday if I am a terrible person.
If you are a winner, I will notify you using the address you provided to Rafflecopter.

Do I have to provide my actual email address, even though I worry that you will use it to steal my soul and then go on a shopping spree at Forever 21? Yes, please use an actual email address. I don’t even want your soul. Your valid email is the only way I have of getting in touch with you if you win, so please make sure that when you sign up for Rafflecopter, you use an active address! If I can’t get in touch with you, I’ll pick a different winner.

 

If the Rafflecopter form doesn’t show up below, here’s the link to enter.

a Rafflecopter giveaway